Thanks sarge, I have always looked forward to your comments on many subjects. Unfortunately with my attitude there would only be 2 votes out there. Yours & mine.

In my humble opinion, the reason this is happening is that we are all human beings & as such we will always be looking for the most we can get with the least amount of effort. There is a huge lack of moral compass in humanity today. We live in a secular society where we can set the rules for what is right for us and we don't have to worry what anyone else thinks because there are no higher standards being set for society by anyone who is "In Charge" We let it happen because we keep re-electing the government that will give us the most without us having to work for it. Unfortunately someone has to pay the price someday & it will all come crashing down when the people paying for it get fed up and say to hell with it. Why should I work & pay for someone else when they won't fend for themselves.

The Psychiatrist and the Proctologist

Best friends graduated from medical school at the same time and decided that in spite of two different specialties, they would open a practice together to share office space and personnel.

Dr. Smith was the psychiatrist and Dr. Jones was the proctologist; they put up a sign reading: Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors. The town council was livid and insisted they change it.

The docs changed it to read: Schizoids and Hemorrhoids. This was also not acceptable so they again changed the sign to read Catatonics and High Colonics - no go. Next they tried Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives - thumbs down again.

Then came Minds and Behinds - still no good. Another attempt resulted in Lost Souls and Butt Holes - unacceptable again! So they tried Nuts and Butts - no way. Freaks and Cheeks - still no good. Loons and Moons - forget it. Almost at their wit's end, the docs finally came up with:

Wait for it

Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones - Specializing in Odds and Ends.
Everybody loved it.

I have a very simple Samsung cell phone. It has issues that their tech support has given up on. I've come to the conclusion that Samsung is not a very user friendly company. When it's time to get a new phone it will definitely not be a Samsung.

Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me! I want people to know why I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved. :lol:

Whew!!!! That was fun

The following questions were asked in last year’s examination
These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)............and they WILL breed.

Q. Name the four seasons
A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar

Q. Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink
A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists

Q. How is dew formed
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire

Q. What causes the tides in the oceans
A. The tides are a fight between the earth and the moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins the fight

Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on
A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed

Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections
A. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election

Q. What are steroids
A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs (Shoot yourself now , there is little hope)

Q... What happens to your body as you age
A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental

Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty
A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery (So true)

Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes
A. Premature death

Q. What is artificial insemination
A. When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow

Q. How can you delay milk turning sour
A. Keep it in the cow (Simple, but brilliant)

Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body categorised (e.g. The abdomen)
A. The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A, E, I,O,U.. (wtf!)

Q. What is the fibula?
A. A small lie

Q. What does 'varicose' mean?
A. Nearby Asian answer!

Q What is the most common form of birth control
A. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium (That would work)

Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'
A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome

Q. What is a seizure?
A. A Roman Emperor. (Julius Seizure, I came, I saw, I had a fit)

Q. What is a terminal illness
A. When you are sick at the airport. (Irrefutable)


Q. What does the word 'benign' mean?
A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight (brilliant)

What a creative mind, wish I could come up with ideas like this for a shot. I love it.

I was sent this link & thought it was very well done. Hope you all will enjoy it too.

http://vimeo.com/58385453

If it doesn't work, I'm sorry, but it worked for me.

I agree with Steve, 256 makes sense to me. The other solutions are too complicated to get my brain around them. :lol: :lol: :lol:

I don't really give a rip what Snopes or anyone else says about the statistics in the message. I just want to know how an average person can be elected to congress without a fortune in his pocket for the campaign & then years later retire from congress as a multi millionaire, like our own Senator Tom Harkin who just announced that he will not run for re-election in 2 years. He hasn't owned property in the state for years and his retirement home is in the Bahamas. As far as I'm concerned every single member of congress, all 535 of them, whether they be Republican or Democrat are all on the take from someone or they wouldn't be able to stay there. They are all a bunch of low life scum crooks and we are all fools for letting them get away with sending us the bill for their for the mess they have made of this once great country. It will never be the same until we get rid of all of them and start over with term limits to prevent it from happening again. But I'm afraid it is probably too late for that now. We've passed the point of no return.

NBA VS NFL?

Even if you aren't a Sports Fan this is

Very Interesting!

36 have been accused of spousal abuse

7 have been arrested for fraud

19 have been accused of writing bad checks

117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses

3 have done time for assault

71, I repeat 71

cannot get a credit card due to bad credit

14 have been arrested on drug-related charges

8 have been arrested! for shoplifting

21 currently are defendants in lawsuits,

and

84 have been arrested for drunk driving

in the last year !

Can you guess which organization this is?

Is it the NBA Or NFL?

Give up yet?

Neither,

it's the 535 members of the
United States Congress

The same group of Idiots that crank out
hundreds of new laws each year
designed to keep the rest of us in line.

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally , the guys' side of the story.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear "the rules"
From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question..

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying , but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Football, Hunting, Fishing

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Lesson # 1:

* U.S. Tax revenue: $ 2,170,000,000,000
* Fed budget: $ 3,820,000,000,000
* New debt: $ 1,650,000,000,000
* National debt: $14,271,000,000,000
* Recent budget cuts: $ 38,500,000,000

Now remove 8 zeros and pretend it's a household budget:

* Annual family income: $ 21,700
* Money the family spent: $ 38,200
* New debt on the credit card: $ 16,500
* Outstanding balance on the credit card: $142,710
* Total budget cuts so far: $ 38.50

Got It ?????
OK now,

Lesson # 2:

Here's another way to look at the Debt Ceiling:
Let's say, You come home from work and find

there has been a sewer backup in your neighborhood....

and your home has sewage all the way up to your ceilings.

What do you think you should do ......

Raise the ceilings, or remove the shit?

:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: