What did I tell you about Audi and other German car drivers:
https://www.msn.com/en-gb/news/uknews/audi-driver-runs-over-mclaren-in-sainsbury-s-car-park-leaving-shoppers-in-disbelief/ar-BB1aaoRP?ocid=ob-fb-engb-1511253547831&fbclid=IwAR07ZP8ugG52_FaugxPLnY2CX5HpuujuARJznwyJUOg6tV5sMxGnRLBCoPk

This one managed to drive over the top of a Maclaren supercar in a supermarket carpark - absolute danger to everyone on the road.

I agree with you on these terrible drivers of their "superior" cars. There is what I call the "Audi maneouvre" on the motorways - the object of which is for the driver to reach the fast lane in as short a distance as possible from the slip road. There is also the reverse whereby they leave the fast lane as close to the slip road exit as possible. The rest of the traffic on the motorway has to brake hard to avoid being hit by these maniacs. I've seen it performed so often that I instantly recognise it and it is invariably a German car that is doing it. They appear to be totally oblivious to what they are forcing others to do to avoid an accident. Whenever I've spoken to drivers of such cars they invariably claim that they have far better vehicles than the cheaper alternatives and that they would never buy them because they are complete crap! I then say "Well despite that belief you obviously have 100% faith in the braking ability of these cheap cars or you wouldn't be capable of driving so badly without being hit by them!". This is usually met by an expression of complete puzzlement on their faces.

Double negatives in peoples speech eg. "They didn't do nothing to help me!". In my head the question arises "What did they do then?". Presumably they meant to say that someone DID nothing!

Autocorrect only needs to swap around two letters and your message is urined!

Test yourself for old age:-
Next time you use the blower dryer after washing your hands in a washroom turn your hands so that it is blowing onto the back of them. If the skin is flapping about in the airflow you have reached old age!

"So...." is being used at the beginning of every response e.g. interviewer asks someone what they do for a living and the answer comes "So, I'm a bank clerk". Once you notice it really grates on the ear.

Definition of a pirate?

A man who, in female company, can shout "Avast behind!" without getting his face slapped.

The "bubble" system as it appears to be applied here in Northern England:
Retired couple - you and your wife.
Middle-aged couple - you, your wife and the children.
Young couple with baby - you, your wife, the baby and any extended family.
Young single people - you and everyone in the same age group that you meet at an illegal rave party.

I used to believe that 50% of the population was of lower than average intelligence but as I grow older I'm becoming convinced that it is a far higher percentage than that!

In the UK we have similar problems with tool and materials quality. It seems to me that the screws bought decades ago were of harder steel and brass than those I find in stores today. A lot of our brassware is made in India and is definitely of poor quality I once found the slots in a box of them were cut off centre making them useless. For some years the Forces have bought ammunition from India and I hope that a) the quality is up to the mark and b) we never start a war with India!

That reminds me of a conversation I had with my teenage son during which I was warning him of the possible consequences of the latest hare-brained thing he was about to do.
Son:"C'mon Dad! I'm not that stupid!"
Me:"Okay son, you tell me how stupid you are and then I can stop guessing!".

My guess is that it is the same country that supplies the world with eyetest charts!

In England we "graduate from University" from other institutions such as a college, technical school etc we simply "finish training" or "complete our studies".
I had a conversation with a young work colleague who asked me why I speak with a lot of "old fashioned words". After a moments thought I replied that we are very fortunate to have been born into one of the most expressive languages in the world and with that "palette of words" at our disposal it would be a terrible waste to only choose from a child's "paintbox of primary colours". by the puzzled look on his face I was left with the impression that he had not encountered the use of analogy in language either.

I'd like to know why all replies to questions we hear on TV and radio begin with the word "So.......". For example a presenter asks a guest what they do for a living and the answer almost invariably is "So...... I work for a national supermarket chain". Once you notice it, the repetition becomes very irritating.

Another recent habit developed in the UK is the answer to "How are you today?" for some reason it has become "I'm good, thanks". That is the answer to the question "Are you a good or bad person?". The correct answer would state how you are feeling today.

I am convinced that the majority of products are released into the market without even this level of scrutiny. So many items that my family has bought and found problems with have been shown to me. It is obvious that the designers have never attempted to use them. One example was a domestic pendant light with a ceiling rose that was to be assembled using tiny electrical grub screws into the sides of the fitting very close to the ceiling. None of my small electric screwdrivers had handles that didn't clash with the ceiling and allow the shank to properly align with the grub screws. In the end I had to use a watchmakers screwdriver in a series of quarter turns whilst standing at the top of a stepladder. I'm convinced that these designers have twin siblings who design webpages that don't make sense either.