What are the best one line insults and put downs?
Jun 14, 2012 09:59:38 #
talk2thomas
Loc: Chelmsford, England
some of the responces I used from stand up.
"Can you put the lid back on that dust bin(trash can)"
"next time you buy a bin can you make sure it has a lid."
"Can you flush that orafice next to you."
"Can you put the muzzle back onto the dog next to you"
If I am out and there is a que jumper I ask "do you like fish?" and the responce then is "there is a place behind me"
Or if I am talking to an Idiot "If I wanted a silly burger(bugger) I would have gone to macdonnalds for one."
Or my favoriate at the moment is
"you have the face photoshop was made for."
"Can you put the lid back on that dust bin(trash can)"
"next time you buy a bin can you make sure it has a lid."
"Can you flush that orafice next to you."
"Can you put the muzzle back onto the dog next to you"
If I am out and there is a que jumper I ask "do you like fish?" and the responce then is "there is a place behind me"
Or if I am talking to an Idiot "If I wanted a silly burger(bugger) I would have gone to macdonnalds for one."
Or my favoriate at the moment is
"you have the face photoshop was made for."
Sep 13, 2013 09:43:25 #
Who are the only one I know that when you walk into a room everybody thinks you're just left
Sep 13, 2013 11:26:47 #
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Sep 13, 2013 11:55:32 #
johnr9999 wrote:
Also not a one liner, and I'm sorry I can't remember who said it (British), but when asked if he expected to die on the gallows or a by a venereal disease, he replied, "That depends on whether I embrace your politics or your mistress."
I want to say that was Churchill, not sure, but it does sound like one of his
Sep 13, 2013 13:06:26 #
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