I broke my sister's heart ...
Mar 4, 2012 11:25:39 #
I think you made the right decision but are stuck between a rock and a hard place. If you feel as you do then inevitably there would be disappointment on her part over you're lack of experience and desire to shoot the wedding. On top of that, a wedding photographer should already know what works and what doesn't. She should be made aware of that and that hopefully these photos (pictures) ;-) she'll want for their lifetime and that can be a long time to be disappointed in them. That's the rock. The hard place is if she DOES go ahead and hire someone and is disappointed in those. If that happens you again wind up with the blame for not taking them. Hopefully your friend will come through though and find someone skilled and talented for her wedding. I would also explain that good photo's don't come from great camera's. They come from people with the knowledge and skill and talent to compose those photos. Just compare your typical tourist photo's of Yosemite with their $1000 camera's to what Ansel Adams produced. This is just me but I would pretty much put it to her word for word just this way. Good luck to you.
Mar 4, 2012 11:34:55 #
photogrl57 wrote:
You did the right thing .. no matter what happens with the pro ... If you are planning on attending the wedding .. I would still take the camera ... and get as many photos as you can ... whatever turns out .. she will just have that many more photos to remember her special day. Plus it will give you people practise ...
Agreed, take your camera and do your own discreet photoshoot, no matter what happens you will capture some that the pro won't or can't. While he spend's the half hour immediately after the ceremony photographing the people in the party, you can be getting candid shots of that and the guests, perhaps also some short video's of people and their wishes and blessings you can put together as a surprise for her later. One thing I think we all know, is that you can easily take 500 photos and have 400 turn out garbage but those that you can keep will be priceless. Blown wedding photo's you can't replace, use a pro and take your own and then let her have the best of both. I would also not delete any I took until she saw them because she might like something in one you won't even see.
Mar 4, 2012 11:53:20 #
Pepper
Loc: Planet Earth Country USA
Rader wrote:
Not sure what your family is like guess mine is closer. I shot my sisters wedding. I was just out of college I knew little understanding light and yes i did it for free. They werent great photos but they were good not great. She appreciated the job and I enjoyed doing it for her. I guess family dynamics work different for everyone
I'm with you on this one Rader, keep in mind however that this is a photography forum and so the importance of the wedding photos will be a much higher priority to most of these folks than you may find with most folks on the street.
Mar 4, 2012 11:55:56 #
AVarley wrote:
... when I told her I wouldn't shoot her wedding. ... (show quote)
Very wise person with a generous heart and one who knows their strengths/weaknesses and able to make decisions accordingly. You did good! No reason whatsoever for you to feel a "little bad." :thumbup:
As a sidenote, a relative said to me the other day after I had, for the first time, emailed some of my photos to her:
"I love all these pics, you must have one great camera!"
Mar 4, 2012 11:56:31 #
JudyL wrote:
I decided early on when I "took" up photography, that I would not do weddings (have you ever seen Bridezills)?
I have taken some candids at a couple receptions. The only children or baby pics I take is of my own grandchildren.
I know how lucretive it can be, but since I am independantly wealthy....hahaha.
I have taken some candids at a couple receptions. The only children or baby pics I take is of my own grandchildren.
I know how lucretive it can be, but since I am independantly wealthy....hahaha.
Well it is good to know where your strengths are. I don't think I would like to do weddings either, (I love to photograph people ) I have a friend who does and it is weeks worth of work for each one and many hours the day of the wedding. I did some photos for Patch.com yesterday ;a couple of hours for the opening day baseball, in and out , good pay :) done. They don't even require editing, even though I crop out the crap like trash cans. Easy work. I have a shoot with an alpaca again tomorrow;)
Mar 4, 2012 12:05:43 #
jerryc41 wrote:
I'd love to know how that happened. I have a 64MB SD card, and I'm tempted to submerge it and see what happens.
Would anyone else like to try this and save me the trouble?
Correction: that's a CF card, and they seem to have more openings.
Nikon_DonB wrote:
It turns out that somehow the so-called pros memory chips from "both" of her Canons somehow had gotten wet and were destroyed. All the images were lost.
I'd love to know how that happened. I have a 64MB SD card, and I'm tempted to submerge it and see what happens.
Would anyone else like to try this and save me the trouble?
Correction: that's a CF card, and they seem to have more openings.
I don't know about a camera's memory chip but I had a bunch of digital JigSaw Puzzles that I made and copied to an old, very used Lexamar Jump Drive (we paid nearly $100. for 1GB for it many years ago). My husband had it in a shirt pocket and it went through both a washing machine AND dryer. Guess what? It STILL WORKS perfectly.
Mar 4, 2012 12:05:47 #
pkhadley
Loc: Centrtal Ne York
you were correct in truning down your sister. I had my brother shot th pics for my wedding 39 years ago. 35 mm camaras were just coming out and my younger brother had just came home from th war and had one of those new camara. The younger brother was in the wedding so he let th older brother use his camara to shoot my wedding. He bought 6 rolls of film and shots pics all day. I took the pics to be developed and when I got them back I was devisatated. They were slides!!! Now that is not a bad thing in itself but all the indoor pics were black and we didn't do many outdoor shots. The problem he did not know how to use the camara. So even if you thnk a family member is a "professonal" think again. Don't put your family member in that possition. I know this could have happen to a real professional but I don't think so. So I hope this cheers you up on your decession not to shoot yur sisters weddding and the money is the best gift you could send her. Go to her wedding and shoot lots of candid pics and surprise her with a slide show when she comes home from her honeymoon.
Mar 4, 2012 12:06:35 #
Freeaviator wrote:
checkmark wrote:
Yea but he carried around, a long barrowed Colt 45 ??? Not many people gona make him do what he don't want-ta do??
....a .44 magnum.."the most powerful handgun in the world, capable of blowin your head CLEAN OFF, now I ask ya do you feel lucky?"JCook wrote:
Clint Eastwood said it best " A mans got to know his limitations"
Yea but he carried around, a long barrowed Colt 45 ??? Not many people gona make him do what he don't want-ta do??
No ones holding a gun to anyones head. Yet evan if they do so what ever
Mar 4, 2012 12:23:37 #
AVarley wrote:
... when I told her I wouldn't shoot her wedding. ... (show quote)
Very smart move. What I like about animals and landscapes is that they don't complain if things don't go well.
Mar 4, 2012 12:26:35 #
I don't think you should feel like your letting her down because I've encountered the same situations and knowing in my heart how important those moments would be to miss capturing that once in a lifetime expression or pose would always be in your memory. I can't remember ever seeing a wedding image taken by Ansel, though he did some wonder portraits. You'll never get any complaints from mother nature for missing the moment - just watch out for those lightning bolts! Keep up the good shooting-Gene C.
Mar 4, 2012 12:44:45 #
Go to the wedding as a guest, but take your camera along. You may take a spendid shot that you could frame and give as a wedding gift.
My niece was getting married, and at the time, my daughter was taking a photography class, and they were studying exposure compensation. She asked her cousin if she could be there early while the girls were getting dressed, just to practice shooting the white wedding gown, and that she would totally stay out of the way. My niece had no problem with that. Well, everyone was ready, and time was passing, and the photographer never showed up. So my daughter kept shooting, posing, and even got all the pics of the grooms party. Finally, someone called the photographer, and she thought the wedding was the next day!!! My niece asked my daughter if she could take pics of the rest of the wedding, and she agreed (8 months pregnant), she did a beautiful job, and saved the day. Had she not had her camera there, it would've been disasterous!! So, tuck your camera in a bag, and if you see a really special moment of the two of them together, shoot away, and you may just have a beautiful wedding gift.
My niece was getting married, and at the time, my daughter was taking a photography class, and they were studying exposure compensation. She asked her cousin if she could be there early while the girls were getting dressed, just to practice shooting the white wedding gown, and that she would totally stay out of the way. My niece had no problem with that. Well, everyone was ready, and time was passing, and the photographer never showed up. So my daughter kept shooting, posing, and even got all the pics of the grooms party. Finally, someone called the photographer, and she thought the wedding was the next day!!! My niece asked my daughter if she could take pics of the rest of the wedding, and she agreed (8 months pregnant), she did a beautiful job, and saved the day. Had she not had her camera there, it would've been disasterous!! So, tuck your camera in a bag, and if you see a really special moment of the two of them together, shoot away, and you may just have a beautiful wedding gift.
Mar 4, 2012 12:54:34 #
Photographing a wedding puts a lot of stress on the person doing the job. If you have problems, the shoot cannot be repeated. Being a family affair, you deserve to be able to enjoy it with out the pressure of photographing it. Maybe a few fun photo's. You have made a good decision in helping her to find someone else to do the job.
Mar 4, 2012 13:12:44 #
davpal
Loc: long island
YOU DID THE SMART MOVE IN THIS TYPE OF SITUATION THERE
IS NO WAY YOU CAN WIN .YOUR SISTER MAY BE MAD AT YOU FOR A SHORT TIME BUT IF YOU TOOK THE PICTURES AND THEY DID NOT COME OUT RIGHT THE WHOLE FAMILY WOULD HATE YOU
IS NO WAY YOU CAN WIN .YOUR SISTER MAY BE MAD AT YOU FOR A SHORT TIME BUT IF YOU TOOK THE PICTURES AND THEY DID NOT COME OUT RIGHT THE WHOLE FAMILY WOULD HATE YOU
Mar 4, 2012 13:14:05 #
I so agree, don't do the wedding. How kind of you to give money so she can hire a "wedding photographer." You can tell her all of the photographers on your photography forum agree. She needs a wedding photographer to capture her big day.
But if you are going, it would be a nice surprise to get a few candid shots to present later. Don't tell her or the family just do it if you feel like it. Candids can be a wonderful addition. Good luck. Don't give in.
But if you are going, it would be a nice surprise to get a few candid shots to present later. Don't tell her or the family just do it if you feel like it. Candids can be a wonderful addition. Good luck. Don't give in.
Mar 4, 2012 13:17:27 #
Smart decision! Just go and let someone else worry. You certainly wouldn't enjoy the wedding if you were the responsible one for capturing the memories. Bet she wouldn't let you live it down if there was a problem.
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