Posts for: Cheese
Apr 19, 2023 06:51:50 #
Two guys were working at a sawmill one day when one of the guys got too close to the blade and cut off his arm.
His buddy put the severed arm in a plastic bag and rushed it down to the hospital to get re-attached.
The next day he goes to see his chum and finds him playing tennis.
“Incredible!,” says his friend.
“Medical science is amazing!”
Another month goes by and the same two guys are again at the sawmill working when the same guy gets too close to the spinning blade and this time his leg gets cut off.
Again his buddy takes the leg, puts it in a plastic bag and takes it to the hospital to get re-attached.
The next day, he goes down to see his chum and finds him outside playing football.
“Incredible!,” says his friend.
“Medical science is amazing!”
Well, another month goes by and again the same two friends are at the mill cutting wood when suddenly the same guy bends down too close to the blade and off comes his head.
Well, his friend takes the head, puts it in a plastic bag, and heads to the hospital to get it re-attached.
The next day he goes to see his friend but can’t find him.
He sees the doctor walking down the hall and says, “Doc, where is my friend? I brought him in yesterday.”
The doctor thinks for a minute and says, “Oh yeah, some idiot put his head in a plastic bag and he suffocated.”
His buddy put the severed arm in a plastic bag and rushed it down to the hospital to get re-attached.
The next day he goes to see his chum and finds him playing tennis.
“Incredible!,” says his friend.
“Medical science is amazing!”
Another month goes by and the same two guys are again at the sawmill working when the same guy gets too close to the spinning blade and this time his leg gets cut off.
Again his buddy takes the leg, puts it in a plastic bag and takes it to the hospital to get re-attached.
The next day, he goes down to see his chum and finds him outside playing football.
“Incredible!,” says his friend.
“Medical science is amazing!”
Well, another month goes by and again the same two friends are at the mill cutting wood when suddenly the same guy bends down too close to the blade and off comes his head.
Well, his friend takes the head, puts it in a plastic bag, and heads to the hospital to get it re-attached.
The next day he goes to see his friend but can’t find him.
He sees the doctor walking down the hall and says, “Doc, where is my friend? I brought him in yesterday.”
The doctor thinks for a minute and says, “Oh yeah, some idiot put his head in a plastic bag and he suffocated.”
Apr 19, 2023 01:30:42 #
A man left for work one Friday morning.
Instead of going home after work, he stayed out the entire weekend hunting with the boys and spending all his wages. When he finally got home on Sunday night, he was confronted by his very angry wife. After a while she stopped nagging and said, “How would you like it if you didn’t see me for two or three days?”
“That would be fine with me”, he replied.
Monday went by and he didn’t see his wife.
Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same result.
Thursday, the swelling went down just enough for him to see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.
Instead of going home after work, he stayed out the entire weekend hunting with the boys and spending all his wages. When he finally got home on Sunday night, he was confronted by his very angry wife. After a while she stopped nagging and said, “How would you like it if you didn’t see me for two or three days?”
“That would be fine with me”, he replied.
Monday went by and he didn’t see his wife.
Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same result.
Thursday, the swelling went down just enough for him to see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.
Apr 13, 2023 17:08:46 #
👍
I think it might already be taken!
I think it might already be taken!
Apr 8, 2023 16:34:29 #
Recently there was a post here about an incident involving a large well-regarded photo store. The OP had a problem with a purchase, and was told it would take 5 to 7 days to resolve. Unfortunately, he had not received satisfaction after five weeks of following-up.
One of the responses this OP received was “Obviously, you have never run a large business, shit happens. Go take a shower, have a cup of warm liquid and CHILL.” This response received a “thumbs-up” from other readers.
I’m sure the folks who work for FedEx, UPS, and the USPS will be delighted to read this, since the general attitude here about these “large businesses” is that every letter or package lost or mis-delivered is reason to bring back public hangings of their executives in the town square.
One of the responses this OP received was “Obviously, you have never run a large business, shit happens. Go take a shower, have a cup of warm liquid and CHILL.” This response received a “thumbs-up” from other readers.
I’m sure the folks who work for FedEx, UPS, and the USPS will be delighted to read this, since the general attitude here about these “large businesses” is that every letter or package lost or mis-delivered is reason to bring back public hangings of their executives in the town square.
Apr 6, 2023 01:25:47 #
John describes his cars by saying: They are all white, except for two. They are all black, except for two. They are all red, except for two.
How many cars does John have?
How many cars does John have?
Apr 3, 2023 22:15:35 #
Tex-s wrote:
Assuming incandescent bulbs. Flip one switch for 10 seconds and another for 30. Switch both off and go feel for cold warm and hot.
Well done. The more detailed answer:
Turn on switch 1 and 2
Wait 5 minutes
Turn off switch 2
Open door
Switch 1 controls the bulb that is lit
Switch 2 controls the bulb that is not lit, but is warm
Switch 3 controls the bulb that is cold
Apr 3, 2023 07:56:36 #
You are in a room that has three switches labeled 1, 2, and 3. The switches control three light bulbs in the next room, on the other side of a closed door. Once you open the door, you may not touch the switches again. How can you definitively tell which switch controls each of the light bulbs?
Apr 2, 2023 09:56:32 #
pumakat wrote:
I guess I am dense. I don't get it.
How about now?
Apr 1, 2023 17:11:55 #
My friend in Australia who sent me the pic provided this explanation:
The P plate is there to indicate that the driver of the vehicle has a Provisional licence. When someone first gets a licence they carry a L (Learner) plate, followed by a green P (Provisional) plate, followed by a red P and graduate to no plates.
The P plate is there to indicate that the driver of the vehicle has a Provisional licence. When someone first gets a licence they carry a L (Learner) plate, followed by a green P (Provisional) plate, followed by a red P and graduate to no plates.
Apr 1, 2023 09:14:47 #
Does anyone know how this story ends?
Mar 31, 2023 17:55:58 #
Jesu S wrote:
One of my favorites.
I wonder if that is a reference to the driver or the guy following him. 😀
Mar 31, 2023 14:14:57 #
So difficult to get it just right…
Mar 21, 2023 10:10:16 #
Bayou wrote:
It likely is formatted to Ext4 and Windows may not... (show quote)
I do not have a bootable Linux thumb drive. The old Linux machine is dead and discarded. I only have very limited Linux skills.
Mar 21, 2023 10:07:16 #
Laramie wrote:
Do you have qemu or similar installed? Put a Linux distro in your vm, connect the disk and repartition to one disk and format to fat32.
No, I do not have QEMU.
Mar 21, 2023 00:05:21 #
The Win 10 machine does not recognize the Linux drive. Not in explorer. Not in Disk Management.