Humor from CARP
Aug 5, 2015 15:17:10 #
Questions and Answers from CARP (Canadian Association of Retired People) Forum
Q: Where can single men over the age of 60 find younger women who are interested in them?
A: Try a bookstore, under Fiction .
Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy . If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement .. When you're done, you will have a place to live .
Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the bible. Is that true?
Where can it be found?
A: Yes . Matthew 14:92:
"And Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt . . .. "
Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your over-60 year-old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant .
Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses .
Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless . It will usually pull them out . .
Q: Why should 60 plus year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car .
Q: Is it common for 60-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A:
A: Storing memory is not a problem, Retrieving it is the problem ..
Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon .
Q: Where should 60-plus year olds look for eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads .
Q: What is the most common remark made by 60-plus year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember these!"
SMILE, You've still got your sense of humor!
Q: Where can single men over the age of 60 find younger women who are interested in them?
A: Try a bookstore, under Fiction .
Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy . If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement .. When you're done, you will have a place to live .
Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the bible. Is that true?
Where can it be found?
A: Yes . Matthew 14:92:
"And Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt . . .. "
Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your over-60 year-old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant .
Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your glasses .
Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go braless . It will usually pull them out . .
Q: Why should 60 plus year old people use valet parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your car .
Q: Is it common for 60-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?
A:
A: Storing memory is not a problem, Retrieving it is the problem ..
Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon .
Q: Where should 60-plus year olds look for eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads .
Q: What is the most common remark made by 60-plus year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember these!"
SMILE, You've still got your sense of humor!
Aug 6, 2015 07:56:51 #
Aug 6, 2015 10:33:26 #
Why are all of these so darned familiar? :) :) :)
Thanks for the post, great way to start my day.
Tom
Thanks for the post, great way to start my day.
Tom
Aug 6, 2015 11:33:58 #
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