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A Jewish Momma and an Italian Momma
Mar 20, 2015 21:35:09 #
Going the e-mail rounds. Thanks Bob. :lol: :lol:
A Jewish Momma and an Italian Mamma
JEWISH MOMMA
The year is 2020 and the United States has elected the first Jewish woman President, Susan Goldfarb.
She calls up her mother a few weeks after Election Day and says, 'So, Momma, I assume you'll be
coming to my inauguration?'
'I don't think so. It's a ten hour drive, your father isn't as young as he used to be, and my arthritis is acting
up again.'
'Don't worry about it Momma, I'll send Air Force One to pick you up and take you home. And a limousine will
pick you up at your door.'
'I don't know. Everybody will be so fancy-schmantzy, what on earth would I wear?'
Susan replies, 'I'll make sure you have a wonderful gown custom-made by the best designer in New York.'
'Honey,' Momma complains, 'you know I can't eat those rich foods you and your friends like to eat.'
The President-to-be responds, 'Don't worry Momma. The entire affair is going to be handled by the best caterer
in New York, kosher all the way. Momma, I really want you to come.'
So Momma reluctantly agrees and on January 20, 2021, Susan Goldfarb is being sworn in as
President of the United States.
In the front row sits the new President's mother, who leans over to a senator sitting next to her and says,
'You see that woman over there with her hand on the Torah, becoming President of the United States?
The Senator whispers back, 'Yes I do.
Mom says proudly, 'Her brother is a DOCTOR!!!'.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Italian Mamma
Giuseppe excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and that he is going to get married.
He says, 'Just for fun, Mama, I'm going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I'm going to
marry.'
The mother agrees.
The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house, sits them down on the couch and they chat for a
while.
He then says, 'Okay, Mama, guess which one I'm going to marry?'
Mama says immediately, 'The one on the right.'
'That's amazing, Mama. You're right. How did you know?'
Mama replies: 'I don't like her.'
A Jewish Momma and an Italian Mamma
JEWISH MOMMA
The year is 2020 and the United States has elected the first Jewish woman President, Susan Goldfarb.
She calls up her mother a few weeks after Election Day and says, 'So, Momma, I assume you'll be
coming to my inauguration?'
'I don't think so. It's a ten hour drive, your father isn't as young as he used to be, and my arthritis is acting
up again.'
'Don't worry about it Momma, I'll send Air Force One to pick you up and take you home. And a limousine will
pick you up at your door.'
'I don't know. Everybody will be so fancy-schmantzy, what on earth would I wear?'
Susan replies, 'I'll make sure you have a wonderful gown custom-made by the best designer in New York.'
'Honey,' Momma complains, 'you know I can't eat those rich foods you and your friends like to eat.'
The President-to-be responds, 'Don't worry Momma. The entire affair is going to be handled by the best caterer
in New York, kosher all the way. Momma, I really want you to come.'
So Momma reluctantly agrees and on January 20, 2021, Susan Goldfarb is being sworn in as
President of the United States.
In the front row sits the new President's mother, who leans over to a senator sitting next to her and says,
'You see that woman over there with her hand on the Torah, becoming President of the United States?
The Senator whispers back, 'Yes I do.
Mom says proudly, 'Her brother is a DOCTOR!!!'.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Italian Mamma
Giuseppe excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and that he is going to get married.
He says, 'Just for fun, Mama, I'm going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I'm going to
marry.'
The mother agrees.
The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house, sits them down on the couch and they chat for a
while.
He then says, 'Okay, Mama, guess which one I'm going to marry?'
Mama says immediately, 'The one on the right.'
'That's amazing, Mama. You're right. How did you know?'
Mama replies: 'I don't like her.'
Mar 20, 2015 21:51:07 #
Mar 20, 2015 23:20:21 #
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Mar 21, 2015 00:02:01 #
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Mar 21, 2015 11:18:14 #
NeilL
Loc: British-born Canadian
bcheary wrote:
Going the e-mail rounds. Thanks Bob. :lol: :lol: ... (show quote)
Very funny - and probably based on truth. What's this? No libs accusing you of racism?
Mar 21, 2015 11:40:25 #
Mar 21, 2015 13:56:59 #
Mar 21, 2015 13:57:49 #
Nikocarol wrote:
Hahaha...and oh soooo true. hahahaha
:thumbup: :thumbup: :-D
Mar 21, 2015 13:59:31 #
NeilL wrote:
Very funny - and probably based on truth. What's this? No libs accusing you of racism?
:lol: :lol: Not yet.
Mar 21, 2015 13:59:53 #
Mar 22, 2015 01:22:19 #
Mar 22, 2015 09:15:54 #
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