DIVORCE AGREEMENT-
The person who wrote this is a college (law) student.. Perhaps there is hope for us after all.
DIVORCE AGREEMENT
THIS IS SO INCREDIBLY WELL PUT AND I CAN HARDLY BELIEVE IT'S BY A YOUNG PERSON, A STUDENT!!! WHATEVER HE RUNS FOR, I'LL VOTE FOR HIM.
Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists and Obama supporters, et al: We have stuck together since the late 1950's for the sake of the kids, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has clearly run its course.
Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right for us all, so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.
Here is a our separation agreement:
--Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a similar portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.
--We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them.
--You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.
--Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military.
--We'll take the nasty, smelly oil industry and the coal mines, and you can go with wind, solar and bio diesel.
--You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell. You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them.
--We'll keep capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart and Wall Street.
--You can have your beloved lifelong welfare dwellers, food stamps, homeless, home boys, hippies, druggies and illegal aliens.
--We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks.
--We'll keep Bill O'Reilly, and Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood .
--You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us.
--You can have the peaceniks and war protesters. When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll help provide them security.
--We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values.
--You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, political correctness and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N. But we will no longer be paying the bill.
--We'll keep the SUV's, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Volt and Leaf you can find.
--You can give everyone healthcare if you can find any practicing doctors.
--We'll keep "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" and "The National Anthem."
--I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute "Imagine", "I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing", "Kum Ba Ya" or "We Are the World".
--We'll practice trickle-down economics and you can continue to give trickle up poverty your best shot.
--Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name and our flag.
Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like-minded liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just hit delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you might think about which one of us will need whose help in 15 years.
Sincerely,
John J. Wall
Law Student and an American
P.S. Also, please take Ted Turner, Sean Penn, Martin & Charlie Sheen, Barbara Streisand, & ( Hanoi ) Jane Fonda with you.
P.S.S. And you won't have to press 1 for English when you call our country.
mugwhump: I am with you. I am a Canadian, but I would vote for this guy as well.
Interesting reading
Steve
I sort of doubt the validity of this. I've found references to this as early as later 2008. None of the sites I check could vouch for the validity of the letter.
traveler90712 wrote:
I sort of doubt the validity of this. I've found references to this as early as later 2008. None of the sites I check could vouch for the validity of the letter.
Same here, I do always find it funny that people will take chain emails at face value. Anyone remember the telephone game? Same thing happens with chain emails.
Erv
Loc: Medina Ohio
Sounds good to me. I would vote for his kid too!! I a heart beat. And very strange words coming from a young man. I didn't think we were teaching the kids independence any more. I thought it was all about money and living the high life. He must not watch much TV!!!
Erv
Nice find Wayne!!!!
What is the difference of the validity of it or not? A point was made and a very good one at that. It was a very good observation & too bad it couldnt happen.
Erv wrote:
Sounds good to me. I would vote for his kid too!! I a heart beat. And very strange words coming from a young man. I didn't think we were teaching the kids independence any more. I thought it was all about money and living the high life. He must not watch much TV!!!
Erv
Nice find Wayne!!!!
Thanks Erv, thought you would like it.
traveler90712 wrote:
I sort of doubt the validity of this. I've found references to this as early as later 2008. None of the sites I check could vouch for the validity of the letter.
See Jiminey1's response it applies to your comment.
Annie_Girl wrote:
Same here, I do always find it funny that people will take chain emails at face value. Anyone remember the telephone game? Same thing happens with chain emails.
See Jiminey1's response it applies to your comment.
traveler90712 wrote:
I sort of doubt the validity of this. I've found references to this as early as later 2008. None of the sites I check could vouch for the validity of the letter.
See Jiminey1's response it applies to your comment.
traveler90712 wrote:
I sort of doubt the validity of this. I've found references to this as early as later 2008. None of the sites I check could vouch for the validity of the letter.
In what way does it matter who the original author was? Surely it is the content that is the whole point of the post.
So thanks Traveller, this was new to me.
I notice this "American" doesn't mention elections. You know that inconvenient thing we do in the United States where you might not get your way. If you don't like what is going on in this Democracy I suggest you move to a place that keeps to all your principles of no government and you can keep you guns and you do not have to pay for any services or keeping your money, Somalia should fit that bill and we would all be happier for it.
That's right: trivialize... step one of the liberal argument.
traveler90712 wrote:
I sort of doubt the validity of this. I've found references to this as early as later 2008. None of the sites I check could vouch for the validity of the letter.
The reactionaries on this site will say and do anything, including lying, to try and attack liberalism.
But that is typical of the uber-right, why be surprised.
If you want to reply, then
register here. Registration is free and your account is created instantly, so you can post right away.