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A mans advice to the ladies out there
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Mar 25, 2024 13:57:21   #
scoundrel Loc: Wytheville VA
 
srg wrote:
Haha. Also I can never understand "Teal"
is it a color or a misspelling of a marine mammal.


It is a color very much like cyan if not a synonym for it.

Reply
Mar 25, 2024 14:17:37   #
Finn Man Loc: wisconsin
 
Thought provoking...K.A.N.

Reply
Mar 25, 2024 15:06:10   #
Fredrick Loc: Former NYC, now San Francisco Bay Area
 
jerold222 wrote:
Sorry ladies but it is funny!!!!!!
WE ALWAYS HEAR 'THE RULES' FROM THE FEMALE SIDE
NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE
THESE ARE OUR RULES!
... PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1 ON PURPOSE!
1. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.
1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU'RE A BIG GIRL. IF IT'S UP, PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED IT UP, YOU NEED IT DOWN. YOU DON'T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU LEAVING IT DOWN.
1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.
1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE:
SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK!
STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK!
OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK!
JUST SAY IT!
1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.
1.. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. THAT'S WHAT WE DO. SYMPATHY IS WHAT YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.
1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.
1. IF YOU THINK YOU'RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON'T ASK US.
1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.
1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH.
IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.
1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.
1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE...
1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS..
PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.
1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY 'NOTHING,' WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG. WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.
1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON'T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR..
1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE...REALLY.
1.. DON'T ASK US WHAT WE'RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH TOPICS AS FOOTBALL OR MOTOR SPORTS.
1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES.
1 .. YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.
1. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!
1.. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT.. BUT DID YOU KNOW MEN REALLY DON'T MIND THAT? IT'S LIKE CAMPING...
PASS THIS TO AS MANY MEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A LAUGH...😂
PASS THIS TO AS MANY WOMEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A BIGGER LAUGH, BECAUSE ITS TRUE!....😉
Sorry ladies but it is funny!!!!!! br WE ALWAYS HE... (show quote)

Bread crumbs, bread crumbs!! She always leaves me bread crumbs of information, and then expects me to figure out what she's really saying/wanting. Life would be so much easier if she would just tell me what she wants.

Thankfully, she doesn't read this newsletter.

Yes, I am chicken.

Reply
 
 
Mar 25, 2024 15:20:43   #
BBurns Loc: South Bay, California
 
jerold222 wrote:
Sorry ladies but it is funny!!!!!!
WE ALWAYS HEAR 'THE RULES' FROM THE FEMALE SIDE
NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE
THESE ARE OUR RULES!
... PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1 ON PURPOSE!
1. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.
1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU'RE A BIG GIRL. IF IT'S UP, PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED IT UP, YOU NEED IT DOWN. YOU DON'T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU LEAVING IT DOWN.
1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.
1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE:
SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK!
STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK!
OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK!
JUST SAY IT!
1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.
1.. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. THAT'S WHAT WE DO. SYMPATHY IS WHAT YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.
1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.
1. IF YOU THINK YOU'RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON'T ASK US.
1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.
1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH.
IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.
1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.
1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE...
1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS..
PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.
1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY 'NOTHING,' WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG. WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.
1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON'T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR..
1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE...REALLY.
1.. DON'T ASK US WHAT WE'RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH TOPICS AS FOOTBALL OR MOTOR SPORTS.
1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES.
1 .. YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.
1. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!
1.. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT.. BUT DID YOU KNOW MEN REALLY DON'T MIND THAT? IT'S LIKE CAMPING...
PASS THIS TO AS MANY MEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A LAUGH...😂
PASS THIS TO AS MANY WOMEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A BIGGER LAUGH, BECAUSE ITS TRUE!....😉
Sorry ladies but it is funny!!!!!! br WE ALWAYS HE... (show quote)
Your second number 1 reminded me of this one.



Reply
Mar 25, 2024 16:02:00   #
Lucasdv123
 
I hope you don't have a waterbed.

Reply
Mar 25, 2024 16:02:57   #
Triple G
 
Then, there is this!



Reply
Mar 25, 2024 16:17:22   #
kpsk_sony
 
Took you quite lot of words. When the truth is that ladies are way way smarter than us guys. Give them a few drops of semen and they'll produce a child for you. Give'em a sincere smile and they'll probably surrender their heart. Which only goes to prove that us guys are probably better off with a knapsack and a compass than the house a lady has turned into a home.

Reply
 
 
Mar 25, 2024 18:05:25   #
AirWalter Loc: Tipp City, Ohio
 
BBurns wrote:
Your second number 1 reminded me of this one.


Remember Guys, when you see this mess in the bathroom, "She is just trying to look nice for you'. Most of you are in good shape now with your. soulmate, but remember how empty and silence that home will sound like if her health fails and she is gone. I'm just about 1 & 1/2 months away from 10 years in an empty silent home thanks to cancer twice, and it's horrible - - - - - - - makes you talk to yourself and you will think about talking to a Doctor to help you get out of this misery. You will get up in the morning and clean the liter box, then make breakfast for yourself and the cat or dog, and then set down with your breakfast and turn the tv on while you are eating and watching "Hallmark Movies", and wonder how do these people always have such wonderful lifes with their beautiful soulmate - - - - - then you wonder why some of them actually make you start the day crying because of memories. Do you still surprise her with some flowers when you come home, and take her out to eat to give her a break, and hold her hand when you go out for an evening walk. How many of you think I'm nuts now?

Reply
Mar 25, 2024 18:18:45   #
Triple G
 
AirWalter wrote:
Remember Guys, when you see this mess in the bathroom, "She is just trying to look nice for you'. Most of you are in good shape now with your. soulmate, but remember how empty and silence that home will sound like if her health fails and she is gone. I'm just about 1 & 1/2 months away from 10 years in an empty silent home thanks to cancer twice, and it's horrible - - - - - - - makes you talk to yourself and you will think about talking to a Doctor to help you get out of this misery. You will get up in the morning and clean the liter box, then make breakfast for yourself and the cat or dog, and then set down with your breakfast and turn the tv on while you are eating and watching "Hallmark Movies", and wonder how do these people always have such wonderful lifes with their beautiful soulmate - - - - - then you wonder why some of them actually make you start the day crying because of memories. Do you still surprise her with some flowers when you come home, and take her out to eat to give her a break, and hold her hand when you go out for an evening walk. How many of you think I'm nuts now?
Remember Guys, when you see this mess in the bathr... (show quote)


I don't think you're nuts.

Reply
Mar 25, 2024 18:18:49   #
Lucasdv123
 
My wife cooked for me for 40 years.i told her I would be the cook after I retired.in 2013 i retired and I am the sole cook at our home.we will hit 48 years come September 11 and I don't know what I would do if she was gone.i was hospitalized 4 weeks ago due to a lower bowel obstruction and she was there for me.i lost 16 pounds but I am now eating a lot better and have gained 2 pounds.

Reply
Mar 25, 2024 18:19:34   #
Triple G
 
Lucasdv123 wrote:
My wife cooked for me for 40 years.i told her I would be the cook after I retired.in 2013 i retired and I am the sole cook at our home.we will hit 48 years come September 11 and I don't know what I would do if she was gone.i was hospitalized 4 weeks ago due to a lower bowel obstruction and she was there for me.i lost 16 pounds but I am now eating a lot better and have gained 2 pounds.


Keep up the good progress.

Reply
 
 
Mar 25, 2024 18:44:45   #
AirWalter Loc: Tipp City, Ohio
 
Triple G wrote:
I don't think you're nuts.


Thank you Triple G.


Reply
Mar 25, 2024 18:47:30   #
AirWalter Loc: Tipp City, Ohio
 
Lucasdv123 wrote:
My wife cooked for me for 40 years.i told her I would be the cook after I retired.in 2013 i retired and I am the sole cook at our home.we will hit 48 years come September 11 and I don't know what I would do if she was gone.i was hospitalized 4 weeks ago due to a lower bowel obstruction and she was there for me.i lost 16 pounds but I am now eating a lot better and have gained 2 pounds.


Take better care of yourself Lucasdv123. She needs you too.


Reply
Mar 25, 2024 18:49:27   #
PAR4DCR Loc: A Sunny Place
 


Don

Reply
Mar 25, 2024 18:57:31   #
AirWalter Loc: Tipp City, Ohio
 
jerold222 wrote:
Sorry ladies but it is funny!!!!!!
WE ALWAYS HEAR 'THE RULES' FROM THE FEMALE SIDE
NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE
THESE ARE OUR RULES!
... PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1 ON PURPOSE!
1. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.
1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU'RE A BIG GIRL. IF IT'S UP, PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED IT UP, YOU NEED IT DOWN. YOU DON'T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU LEAVING IT DOWN.
1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.
1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE:
SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK!
STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK!
OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK!
JUST SAY IT!
1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.
1.. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. THAT'S WHAT WE DO. SYMPATHY IS WHAT YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.
1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.
1. IF YOU THINK YOU'RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON'T ASK US.
1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.
1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH.
IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.
1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.
1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE...
1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS..
PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.
1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY 'NOTHING,' WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG. WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.
1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON'T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR..
1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE...REALLY.
1.. DON'T ASK US WHAT WE'RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH TOPICS AS FOOTBALL OR MOTOR SPORTS.
1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES.
1 .. YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.
1. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!
1.. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT.. BUT DID YOU KNOW MEN REALLY DON'T MIND THAT? IT'S LIKE CAMPING...
PASS THIS TO AS MANY MEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A LAUGH...😂
PASS THIS TO AS MANY WOMEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A BIGGER LAUGH, BECAUSE ITS TRUE!....😉
Sorry ladies but it is funny!!!!!! br WE ALWAYS HE... (show quote)


This one is for all the Ladies.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5O6KDuKJoB0&list=PLSDs_VSEQ4j6MF1wjPMVVxF2Y1wMpzLCW&index=7

If you let them hear it it might keep you out of trouble. Neal Diamond.

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