here is a different tack to the above:
The day after his wife disappeared in a kayaking
accident, a Claddaghduff, Ireland man answered his door to find two grim-faced
Constables.
"We're sorry, Mr. O’ Flynn, but we have
some information about your dear wife, Maureen" said one of the officers.
"Tell me! Did you find her?" Michael Patrick
O’Flynn asked.
The constables looked at each other
and one said, "We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great
news. Which would you like to hear first?"
Fearing the worst, Mr. O’ Flynn said, "Give me the bad news
first."
The constable said, "I'm sorry to tell you,
sir, but early this morning we found your poor wife's body in the bay."
"Lord sufferin' Jesus and Holy Mother of God!"
exclaimed O’ Flynn. Swallowing hard, he asked, "What could possibly be the
good news?"
The constable continued, "When we
pulled the late, departed poor Maureen up, she had 12 of the best-looking
Atlantic lobsters that you have ever seen clinging to her. Haven't seen
lobsters like that since the 1960's, and we feel you are entitled to a share in
the catch."
Stunned, Mr. O’ Flynn demanded, "Glory
be to God, if that's the good news, then what's the really great news?"
The constable replied, "We're gonna pull her up again
tomorrow