MATH TEACHER ARRESTED BY TSA
Jan 30, 2013 22:03:21 #
MATH TEACHER ARRESTED BY TSA
A public school teacher was arrested today by TSA at John F. Kennedy International airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
'Al-Gebra is a problem for us', the Attorney General said. 'They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.' They use secret code names like "X" and "Y" and refer to themselves as "unknowns" but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle."
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, "If Allah had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes." White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President. It is believed that another Nobel Prize will follow.
8-)
A public school teacher was arrested today by TSA at John F. Kennedy International airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
'Al-Gebra is a problem for us', the Attorney General said. 'They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.' They use secret code names like "X" and "Y" and refer to themselves as "unknowns" but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle."
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, "If Allah had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes." White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President. It is believed that another Nobel Prize will follow.
8-)
Jan 30, 2013 22:19:21 #
cj wrote:
MATH TEACHER ARRESTED BY TSA br br A public scho... (show quote)
Love the story haha
I hear he has ordered the Government to start saving money as he promised to in the pre election run up. He is giving all those un needed Senators and Congressmen and the clingers on and his ordered that the Capitol Building and the Washington Monument be sold off to the arabs with planning consent, to be used as Mosques so he can go to morning services each day. "He said the Capitol Dome will echo to the sounds of his Iman, singing Obamas Praises.
Ian
Jan 31, 2013 11:46:45 #
Jan 31, 2013 13:07:58 #
Jan 31, 2013 13:48:25 #
ole sarg wrote:
Heard the same but it was Bush! More appropriate when using Bush!
The problem with Bush doing it was that he wanted to turn the Lincoln memorial into a Ice House. If your from Texas you know what I am refering to by Ice House..
:thumbup: :thumbup:
Jan 31, 2013 18:47:12 #
cj wrote:
MATH TEACHER ARRESTED BY TSA br br A public scho... (show quote)
As a former math teacher, this is a great play on words. Love it.
Jan 31, 2013 22:17:40 #
Feb 1, 2013 02:44:38 #
Feb 1, 2013 10:35:34 #
:thumbup: And it's only a slight bit of exaggeration!
But to give them their due, it was the two pointy bits on the dividers that caused them concern.
But to give them their due, it was the two pointy bits on the dividers that caused them concern.
Feb 2, 2013 13:24:53 #
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