Ponderables
Oct 15, 2023 16:25:16 #
going the e-mail rounds. 
01. If a bottle of poison reaches its expiration date, is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?
02. Which letter is silent in the word "Scent,"
the S or the C?
03. Do twins ever realize that one of them is unplanned?
04. Every time you clean something, you just make something else dirty.
05. The word "swims" upside-down is still "swims".
06. Over 100 years ago, everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.
07. If people evolved from monkeys, why are monkeys still around?
08. Why is there a 'D' in fridge, but not in refrigerator?
09. As I've grown older, I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake!
10. I'm responsible for what I say, not for what you understand.
11. Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it the most never use it.
12. My tolerance for idiots is extremely low these days. I used to have some immunity built up, but obviously, there's a new strain out there.
14. It's not my age that bothers me - it's the side effects.
15. I'm not saying I'm old and worn out, but I make sure I'm nowhere near the curb on trash day.
16. As I watch this generation try and rewrite our history, I'm sure of one thing: it will be misspelled and have no punctuation.
17. As I've gotten older, people think I've become lazy. The truth is I'm just being more energy-efficient.
18. I haven't gotten anything done today. I've been in the Produce Department trying to open this stupid plastic bag.
19. If you find yourself feeling useless, remember: it took 20 years, trillions of dollars, thousands of lives and four presidents to replace the Taliban with the Taliban.
20. Turns out that being a "senior" is mostly just googling how to do stuff.
21. I want to be 18 again and ruin my life differently. I have new ideas
22. I'm on two simultaneous diets. I wasn't getting enough food on one.
23. I put my scale in the bathroom corner and that's where the little liar will stay until it apologizes.
24. My mind is like an internet browser. At least 18 open tabs, 3 of them are frozen, and I have no clue where the music is coming from.
25. Hard to believe I once had a phone attached to a wall, and when it rang, I picked it up without knowing who was calling.
26. My wife says I keep pushing her buttons. If that were true, I would have found mute by now.
27. There is no such thing as a grouchy old person. The truth is that once you get old, you stop being polite and start being honest.
01. If a bottle of poison reaches its expiration date, is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?
02. Which letter is silent in the word "Scent,"
the S or the C?
03. Do twins ever realize that one of them is unplanned?
04. Every time you clean something, you just make something else dirty.
05. The word "swims" upside-down is still "swims".
06. Over 100 years ago, everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.
07. If people evolved from monkeys, why are monkeys still around?
08. Why is there a 'D' in fridge, but not in refrigerator?
09. As I've grown older, I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake!
10. I'm responsible for what I say, not for what you understand.
11. Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it the most never use it.
12. My tolerance for idiots is extremely low these days. I used to have some immunity built up, but obviously, there's a new strain out there.
14. It's not my age that bothers me - it's the side effects.
15. I'm not saying I'm old and worn out, but I make sure I'm nowhere near the curb on trash day.
16. As I watch this generation try and rewrite our history, I'm sure of one thing: it will be misspelled and have no punctuation.
17. As I've gotten older, people think I've become lazy. The truth is I'm just being more energy-efficient.
18. I haven't gotten anything done today. I've been in the Produce Department trying to open this stupid plastic bag.
19. If you find yourself feeling useless, remember: it took 20 years, trillions of dollars, thousands of lives and four presidents to replace the Taliban with the Taliban.
20. Turns out that being a "senior" is mostly just googling how to do stuff.
21. I want to be 18 again and ruin my life differently. I have new ideas
22. I'm on two simultaneous diets. I wasn't getting enough food on one.
23. I put my scale in the bathroom corner and that's where the little liar will stay until it apologizes.
24. My mind is like an internet browser. At least 18 open tabs, 3 of them are frozen, and I have no clue where the music is coming from.
25. Hard to believe I once had a phone attached to a wall, and when it rang, I picked it up without knowing who was calling.
26. My wife says I keep pushing her buttons. If that were true, I would have found mute by now.
27. There is no such thing as a grouchy old person. The truth is that once you get old, you stop being polite and start being honest.
Oct 15, 2023 16:31:12 #
Oct 15, 2023 16:42:49 #
kpmac wrote:
Number 16 is my favorite. Several of them apply to me, though.
Oct 15, 2023 17:01:25 #
Oct 15, 2023 17:08:20 #
Oct 15, 2023 18:46:16 #
Oct 15, 2023 18:52:08 #
Oct 15, 2023 19:46:53 #
#7 is easy and a common misunderstanding of evolution. Humans didn't evolve from monkeys. Humans and monkeys evolved from a common ancestor. #18 I just lick my fingers and then it's easy to open those bags.
Oct 15, 2023 20:42:39 #
Oct 16, 2023 08:07:50 #
If one is being honest, ALL apply to me in one way or another. LOL.....
Oct 16, 2023 09:20:52 #
01. No, it's no good. It just makes you vomit all day. 
03. Both unplanned?
06. Make that "multiple houses."
07. A better question: Why are people still around? The world would be better off without humans.
16. And it will be printed, not written in cursive.
24. Definitely!
03. Both unplanned?
06. Make that "multiple houses."
07. A better question: Why are people still around? The world would be better off without humans.
16. And it will be printed, not written in cursive.
24. Definitely!
Oct 16, 2023 10:47:36 #
MosheR
Loc: New York City
bcheary wrote:
going the e-mail rounds. img src="https://static.... (show quote)
Sorry, Brian. I don't understand #10.
Oct 16, 2023 11:09:00 #
MosheR wrote:
Sorry, Brian. I don't understand #10.
I understand it, but I'm not sure I agree. If you are an effective communicator then what you say and what listeners understand will be the same.
Oct 16, 2023 11:39:17 #
JohnSwanda wrote:
#7 is easy and a common misunderstanding of evolution. Humans didn't evolve from monkeys. Humans and monkeys evolved from a common ancestor. #18 I just lick my fingers and then it's easy to open those bags.
Oct 16, 2023 11:41:03 #
If you want to reply, then register here. Registration is free and your account is created instantly, so you can post right away.