I was called up to HR yesterday... I figured it was to talk about my contract coming up in April, but no. Turns out it was regarding a project meeting I attended this last Monday. One...

WNYShooter Loc: WNY

I figured it was to talk about my contract coming up in April, but no. Turns out it was regarding a project meeting I attended this last Monday. One of the "Engineers" on the project, and I use that term loosely as most all of their work product I've seen was flawed, incomplete, and very sloppy in general, complained to HR that in that meeting I showed complete disrespect of their "non-binary" identity, and purposely referred to them in a condescending manner whenever I spoke about or to them in the meeting. I was taken back as this was a weekly project progress meeting of ten people, was very short, and generally pretty lighthearted, there were never any heated moments. I did however instantly know what this was about.

This person's given name is Jennifer, but wants to be called "Emerald Sky", and their, they, them. I only used this person's last name the 3 or 4 times I mentioned them. In this group, there are 3 Johns and 2 Marks, so it's just easier to use last names, never mind that pretty much everyone here normally refers to each other using their last name anyways. I told our HR person exactly that and she told me I should have first asked each of them if it was OK if I referred to them that way??? I then reminded her that she just paged me using "Mr. {my last name}, please come to the Atrium", and that she hadn't first asked me if that was OK, so perhaps she was now disrespecting me in the same manner.

LOL, she just stared at me for about 10 seconds, got up from her desk, and said she would be right back. She returned a few minutes later, smiled, and told me to consider the matter closed and to have a great rest of my day. I'm guessing she went and spoke with the HR Director who, according to his Linkedin, has a JD in law.

I've since learned that the person in question regularly runs to HR about similar such things. All I know is that I will now always address this person by their last name from here on out. Can't wait until their review folder shows up on my desk next month. ;)

Fotoartist Loc: Detroit, Michigan

WNYShooter wrote:

I figured it was to talk about my contract coming up in April, but no. Turns out it was regarding a project meeting I attended this last Monday. One of the "Engineers" on the project, and I use that term loosely as most all of their work product I've seen was flawed, incomplete, and very sloppy in general, complained to HR that in that meeting I showed complete disrespect of their "non-binary" identity, and purposely referred to them in a condescending manner whenever I spoke about or to them in the meeting. I was taken back as this was a weekly project progress meeting of ten people, was very short, and generally pretty lighthearted, there were never any heated moments. I did however instantly know what this was about.

This person's given name is Jennifer, but wants to be called "Emerald Sky", and their, they, them. I only used this person's last name the 3 or 4 times I mentioned them. In this group, there are 3 Johns and 2 Marks, so it's just easier to use last names, never mind that pretty much everyone here normally refers to each other using their last name anyways. I told our HR person exactly that and she told me I should have first asked each of them if it was OK if I referred to them that way??? I then reminded her that she just paged me using "Mr. {my last name}, please come to the Atrium", and that she hadn't first asked me if that was OK, so perhaps she was now disrespecting me in the same manner.

LOL, she just stared at me for about 10 seconds, got up from her desk, and said she would be right back. She returned a few minutes later, smiled, and told me to consider the matter closed and to have a great rest of my day. I'm guessing she went and spoke with the HR Director who, according to his Linkedin, has a JD in law.

I've since learned that the person in question regularly runs to HR about similar such things. All I know is that I will now always address this person by their last name from here on out. Can't wait until their review folder shows up on my desk next month. ;)

I figured it was to talk about my contract coming ... (show quote)

I like the last name nomenclature idea.

WNYShooter Loc: WNY

Fotoartist wrote:

I like the last name nomenclature idea.

You always know the person has issues when they have to follow up their name with preferred pronouns.

Racmanaz Loc: Sunny Tucson!

WNYShooter wrote:

You always know the person has issues when they have to follow up their name with preferred pronouns.

You kinda wonder, is it a mental illness or spiritual illness? Maybe both

Blurryeyed Loc: NC Mountains.

WNYShooter wrote:

I figured it was to talk about my contract coming up in April, but no. Turns out it was regarding a project meeting I attended this last Monday. One of the "Engineers" on the project, and I use that term loosely as most all of their work product I've seen was flawed, incomplete, and very sloppy in general, complained to HR that in that meeting I showed complete disrespect of their "non-binary" identity, and purposely referred to them in a condescending manner whenever I spoke about or to them in the meeting. I was taken back as this was a weekly project progress meeting of ten people, was very short, and generally pretty lighthearted, there were never any heated moments. I did however instantly know what this was about.

This person's given name is Jennifer, but wants to be called "Emerald Sky", and their, they, them. I only used this person's last name the 3 or 4 times I mentioned them. In this group, there are 3 Johns and 2 Marks, so it's just easier to use last names, never mind that pretty much everyone here normally refers to each other using their last name anyways. I told our HR person exactly that and she told me I should have first asked each of them if it was OK if I referred to them that way??? I then reminded her that she just paged me using "Mr. {my last name}, please come to the Atrium", and that she hadn't first asked me if that was OK, so perhaps she was now disrespecting me in the same manner.

LOL, she just stared at me for about 10 seconds, got up from her desk, and said she would be right back. She returned a few minutes later, smiled, and told me to consider the matter closed and to have a great rest of my day. I'm guessing she went and spoke with the HR Director who, according to his Linkedin, has a JD in law.

I've since learned that the person in question regularly runs to HR about similar such things. All I know is that I will now always address this person by their last name from here on out. Can't wait until their review folder shows up on my desk next month. ;)

I figured it was to talk about my contract coming ... (show quote)

HR departments do as much to hinder an organization as they do to advance them.

DukeTarHeel Loc: NC's "Research Triangle"

Racmanaz wrote:

You kinda wonder, is it a mental illness or spiritual illness? Maybe both

or perhaps a seriously misguided narcissist.

Racmanaz Loc: Sunny Tucson!

DukeTarHeel wrote:

or perhaps a seriously misguided narcissist.

The OP?

davidrb Loc: Half way there on the 45th Parallel

WNYShooter wrote:

I figured it was to talk about my contract coming up in April, but no. Turns out it was regarding a project meeting I attended this last Monday. One of the "Engineers" on the project, and I use that term loosely as most all of their work product I've seen was flawed, incomplete, and very sloppy in general, complained to HR that in that meeting I showed complete disrespect of their "non-binary" identity, and purposely referred to them in a condescending manner whenever I spoke about or to them in the meeting. I was taken back as this was a weekly project progress meeting of ten people, was very short, and generally pretty lighthearted, there were never any heated moments. I did however instantly know what this was about.

This person's given name is Jennifer, but wants to be called "Emerald Sky", and their, they, them. I only used this person's last name the 3 or 4 times I mentioned them. In this group, there are 3 Johns and 2 Marks, so it's just easier to use last names, never mind that pretty much everyone here normally refers to each other using their last name anyways. I told our HR person exactly that and she told me I should have first asked each of them if it was OK if I referred to them that way??? I then reminded her that she just paged me using "Mr. {my last name}, please come to the Atrium", and that she hadn't first asked me if that was OK, so perhaps she was now disrespecting me in the same manner.

LOL, she just stared at me for about 10 seconds, got up from her desk, and said she would be right back. She returned a few minutes later, smiled, and told me to consider the matter closed and to have a great rest of my day. I'm guessing she went and spoke with the HR Director who, according to his Linkedin, has a JD in law.

I've since learned that the person in question regularly runs to HR about similar such things. All I know is that I will now always address this person by their last name from here on out. Can't wait until their review folder shows up on my desk next month. ;)

I figured it was to talk about my contract coming ... (show quote)

Play her own game and do not refer to her as anything. Ignore the b***h, she might as well get used to it. By any chance do you remember an actress who wanted to be known as "Barbara Seagull"? Her given name was "Hersey" but she wanted to be known as "Seagull." She sort of disappeared into the trees. So will your "Jennifer."

JohnFrim Loc: Somewhere in the Great White North.

WNYShooter wrote:

I figured it was to talk about my contract coming up in April, but no. Turns out it was regarding a project meeting I attended this last Monday. One of the "Engineers" on the project, and I use that term loosely as most all of their work product I've seen was flawed, incomplete, and very sloppy in general, complained to HR that in that meeting I showed complete disrespect of their "non-binary" identity, and purposely referred to them in a condescending manner whenever I spoke about or to them in the meeting. I was taken back as this was a weekly project progress meeting of ten people, was very short, and generally pretty lighthearted, there were never any heated moments. I did however instantly know what this was about.

This person's given name is Jennifer, but wants to be called "Emerald Sky", and their, they, them. I only used this person's last name the 3 or 4 times I mentioned them. In this group, there are 3 Johns and 2 Marks, so it's just easier to use last names, never mind that pretty much everyone here normally refers to each other using their last name anyways. I told our HR person exactly that and she told me I should have first asked each of them if it was OK if I referred to them that way??? I then reminded her that she just paged me using "Mr. {my last name}, please come to the Atrium", and that she hadn't first asked me if that was OK, so perhaps she was now disrespecting me in the same manner.

LOL, she just stared at me for about 10 seconds, got up from her desk, and said she would be right back. She returned a few minutes later, smiled, and told me to consider the matter closed and to have a great rest of my day. I'm guessing she went and spoke with the HR Director who, according to his Linkedin, has a JD in law.

I've since learned that the person in question regularly runs to HR about similar such things. All I know is that I will now always address this person by their last name from here on out. Can't wait until their review folder shows up on my desk next month. ;)

I figured it was to talk about my contract coming ... (show quote)

Interestingly, you refer to Emerald Sky in your post by using one of her preferred pronouns 7 times. I have put them in bold in the quote.

Seems you have already complied with her wishes, even though you said you would not.

Blurryeyed Loc: NC Mountains.

Personally I would be a bit careful with HR. They wield more power in corporations than many believe. I am not saying to play their game but I think it unwise to antagonize them. Just my thoughts.

skylane5sp Loc: Puyallup, WA

JohnFrim wrote:

Interestingly, you refer to Emerald Sky in your post by using one of her preferred pronouns 7 times. I have put them in bold in the quote.

Seems you have already complied with her wishes, even though you said you would not.

He wasn’t using her ridiculous ‘preferred’ pronouns. He was using PROPER pronouns in his written text as anyone in an English speaking country has been taught forever.

Alafoto Loc: Montgomery, AL

Fotoartist wrote:

I like the last name nomenclature idea.

Has worked well in the military for decades when referring to us E-5s and below.

Alafoto Loc: Montgomery, AL

JohnFrim wrote:

Interestingly, you refer to Emerald Sky in your post by using one of her preferred pronouns 7 times. I have put them in bold in the quote.

Seems you have already complied with her wishes, even though you said you would not.

Wow, touche'

LDB415 Loc: Houston south suburb

At the next meeting inform "it" that your name is (insert name here) but you prefer to be called Master.

JohnFrim Loc: Somewhere in the Great White North.

skylane5sp wrote:

He wasn’t using her ridiculous ‘preferred’ pronouns. He was using PROPER pronouns in his written text as anyone in an English speaking country has been taught forever.

Sorry, pal, I speak English, not Amercun.