Canonuser Loc: UK and South Africa

I have a little Satnav
It sits there in my car
A Satnav is a driver's friend
It tells you where you are
I have a little Satnav
I've had it all my life
It's better than the normal ones
My Satnav is my wife
It gives me full instructions
Especially how to drive
"It's thirty miles an hour", it says
"You're doing thirty five"
It tells me when to stop and start
And when to use the brake
And tells me that it's never ever
Safe to overtake
It tells me when a light is red
And when it goes to green
It seems to know instinctively
Just when to intervene
It lists the vehicles just in front
And all those to the rear
And taking this into account
It specifies my gear.
I'm sure no other driver
Has so helpful a device
For when we leave and lock the car
It still gives its advice
It fills me up with counselling
Each journey's pretty fraught
So why don't I exchange it
And get a quieter sort?
Ah well, you see, it cleans the house,
Makes sure I'm properly fed,
It washes all my shirts and things
And keeps me warm in bed!
Despite all these advantages
And my tendency to scoff,
I only wish that now and then
I could turn the b*gger off

Longshadow Loc: Audubon, PA, United States

Hyacinth.

jaymatt Loc: Alexandria, Indiana

Are you also married to my wife?

BurghByrd Loc: Pittsburgh

Outstanding. I have one of those too.

Longshadow Loc: Audubon, PA, United States

SteveR Loc: Michigan

Hilarious!!

kpsk_sony

Stay Calm, the Queen's in charge.

Schwabo Loc: Florida

Ha Ha good one!!!!

kvanhook Loc: Oriental, NC

Wonderful description. My mother was the poster child of back seat driving.

Moondoggie Loc: Southern California

Very clever!

kdogg Loc: Gallipolis Ferry WV

Got rid of mine and bought a Garmin years ago.

sheldon minsky Loc: iron mountain michigan

I am fortunate in that my SatNav falls asleep as soon as i back out of my garage and stays that way for about six hours. It is like driving around with a cadaver in the front seat.

NewGuy

This is my life