bpulv Loc: Buena Park, CA

I strongly agree! Just say NO. There is no upside for you. You are not properly equipped and have no hands on one on one guidance from a professional. These people obviously want top notch results without paying the price. They will never be happy with what you provide them and you may lose a friend in the process.

When I was in the photography business many years ago, I almost never shot weddings because of the stakes. You can shoot 99 weddings, get rave reviews and build a business. Then, if you screw up one wedding, the word quickly spreads and your business can go down the tubes. Don't touch this with a ten-foot pole.

donald4u Loc: California

Just say no!!!! If you mess up. They will never let you live it down. Why didn't you do this.. You missed that shot. Not just the bride and groom if it gets screwed up. But your entire family. You know Uncle Dick could take better pictures. lol My cousin went thru it. Just think in a year or two. Someone says well it was ok but you should have done this or that. Shooting a wedding is not for the faint hearted. It is a lot of work. Good luck. If the moms get after you. Pack your bags and run like the devil is after you.

E.L.. Shapiro Loc: Ottawa, Ontario Canada

This kinda question arises regulatory on this forum . The same answers are given in response. Most of the advice usually makes sense and others are ridiculous; misogynistic (anti-marriage) others some misogynistic containing disgusting remarks about brides. There is always "sour grapes" from disgruntled, unsuccessful and ex-wedding shooters professing that weddings are "photography hell"!

I have been in the professional wedding photography business for a very long time and believe me, I can tell you many wedding horror stories about inexperienced amateurs and even some rookie pros taking on wedding assignments that the were not ready or equipped for and ended up with seriously nasty lawsuits, loss of reputation and all kinds of unmitigated financial catastrophe.

So...I give my advice and try to dissuade folks form gettin in over their head but alas, they never listen- they don't heed mine or anyone else's warnings and go out and do it anyway!

On the other side of the issue, y'all have to realize that there are some folks (brides and grooms) who don't place all that much importance on their wedding photography or have no idea of what competent and really professional wedding photography entails in terms of image quality, artistry, and actual service on the wedding day. So...they "hire" amateurs, wannabes or call upon the generosity of well meaning friends and relatives. The may very well be satisfied with whatever they get or become "aficionados of fine photography" after the fact and complain vociferously, when the are disappointed with the results.

There are folks who spend a disproportionate percentage of there wedding budge on other stuff and leave whatever is left over for the photography rather that including it as a major consideration. Some people just have a very modest wedding and can simply not affored professional services.

My only advice to the OP is to disregard the sarcasm, sour grapes and othere nonsense and as a person who understands the required skill sets of wedding photography, to simply and honestly explain, to his relatives, all of the possible ramifications of entrusting the job to a non-professional and allow them to make an informed decision. If he should opt to take on the assignment, he should then obtain a documented waver or disclaimer indemnifying himself of any financial or fiduciary responsibility pertaining to the results of the photography- in othere words, they are to except whatever he does as is- no guarantees!

Personally, I would never advise anyone to do anythg they were doubtful or reticent about. If the OP was sure of his abilities, he would no be asking questions. Others who are egging the OP on, perhaps feel that THEY coud tackle such a job based in THEIR own self confidence or experience but in reality, they have no idea of those attributes or lack thereof in the OP.

Believe me again folks, wedding photography, even at a small modest wedding is not a job for the inexperienced shooter and even professionals in other fields of photography can find in a stressful experience. Good equipmet does not necessarily make for good wedding photography! There are skill sets that go far beyond camera work.

Wedding photography can be a rewarding, creative, artful, lucrative, and viable full or part-time profession if you are cut out for the hard work, willing to do the training, gain the experience under mentorship and finally actually knowing what you are doing.

Y'all ARE adults! Work it out!

BHC Loc: Strawberry Valley, JF, USA

FROM THE OP ON PAGE TWO (THAT'S 2 FOR THOSE WHO DON'T READ):

"Thanks for the replies everyone. I just texted her and told her I won’t be doing it. Just waiting for a reply..."

GOOD GRIEF, PEOPLE, IT'S OVER; GIVE IT A REST!!!!!!

Uner Gokcen Loc: Chıcago, Il 60605

Do it, providing:
1. They have a pro photographer on board,
2. You do not charge a penny,
3. Give them digital files or negatives w/o alteration!

E.L.. Shapiro Loc: Ottawa, Ontario Canada

You must realize by now, that on this forum, folks will belabor a subject like this, way beyond the time when a logical conclusion has been reached. Just post something about filters, post processing and Nikon vs. Canon etc.- yea or nay- and get ready for a long thread with lots of the usual type of arguments. You can then opt to join the conversation or just move on to the hundreds of other threads. I just shut down my computer when it gets nerve wracking enough. The LOUDER you yell, the worse it gets!

If you want to shut down conversations, why not volunteer to be a moderator?

BHC Loc: Strawberry Valley, JF, USA

I'm not quite that crazy......yet! I'll just use the unwatchable option.

E.L.. Shapiro Loc: Ottawa, Ontario Canada

Intelligent choice! Best regards.

bpulv Loc: Buena Park, CA

There are changes that could be made to the UHH website that could improve things for everyone.

When the posting person indicates that his question has been answered, it should be clearly displayed on every page of the thread that there has been a status change. That could be accomplished by having a button for the posting party that says "question successfully answered" or some other clear and appropriate wording that would trigger a large clear statement to that effect on every page of the thread.

Also, when I respond to a post even if there is less than a page of respondents, by the time I type my input and post it, I see multiple pages of posts. Looking at the timestamp of the posts, I usually find that most were posted before I responded. That begs the question; why do I not initially see all the posts up to the point when I click respond? I think that may be why many people are accused of not reading when in fact a portion of them do.

Also, people accuse others of not reading everything (often rudely) when the item they are referring to may have been posted while the person had been writing and posting the message that someone is complaining about. I really think that some of the ranker could be avoided if the website was adjusted so that it would be clear which posts were made between the time when the "reply" button is pressed and the reply is posted so people can see which items were not available to the replying party.

AndyH Loc: Massachusetts and New Hampshire

The latter suggestion is a good one. Many board's notify you before posting that there have been subsequent replies since you began your post. But the vast majority of the responses on topics like this come long after the question has been asked and answered definitively. I am not aware of any BBS software that allows the OP to close a topic, but it may exist.

There is no way to avoid the necessity of reading each page on a topic if you wish to make a meaningful contribution. The OP stated his decision early on the second page. I try to never respond unless or until I've started on page one and worked my way through each succeeding page. Although sometimes a post written while you're composing a post may change the game completely, the majority of posts are made many pages after the question has been definitively answered.

There are, however, still some benefits to this. For example, many others may be considering similar propositions to the OP's question, as on this thread. Reading a dozen or more pages of "why this is a bad idea" may convince others who are on the edge of agreeing to do a friend or family member's wedding - an OP's question is often applicable to many other readers.


Just my thoughts - YMMV...

Andy

Besperus Loc: Oregon

A professional earns every cent spent and then some. Two cameras are a necessity, not an option. Experience is part of what you pay for, not enthusiasm. Your only advantage is you know the family. A pro will not (in most cases). Cover the reception by all means...you can be most effective there. You know who’s who. Higher a pro for the ceremony.
This is hard work. You will not have any time to enjoy any part of it!

berchman Loc: South Central PA

I have two photographs from my first wedding which was held in the rabbi's office with just the immediate family present. My brother-in-law took one picture of the bride and me and another of us with our parents. Period. No photos from the big reception. Do I regret that? No. My next marriage, thirty years later, was officiated by a retired cantor in my friend's living room with my wife's kids and my friend and his wife present. No pictures. The reception was in my back yard and a friend of mine took pictures with his Leica as his wedding present.

If people were only able to think things through. Couldn't they find a better use for all the money spent? Not long ago I was talking to the official photographer for Disney World the day before he was to photograph a $300,000 wedding!

We asked my father-in-law to give us the cash instead of paying for the reception in a fancy hotel on Central Park South. Nope. The second time around I was in charge since I was paying. I put up a large tent in my back yard, hired a klezmer band and an Indian caterer, and it was all good.