I'm Back!
Jan 4, 2017 12:48:34 #
Had to be off General Chit-Chat for a while, wife died 13 July, 2016. She was almost 96 years old, missed by one month. We had been expecting it for a while now, as she had lost most of her sight, most of her hearing, could barely walk after a broken thigh bone last year, on oxygen 24/7, and in constant pain. In the hospital on the last day, she asked me "Is this it?" I told her that it looked like it, they could not get a feeding tube down her, and she could not swallow, so she wasn't gong to last long. She said "Good. I hurt, and I want to go home." I told her that I would not hold her here.
She told me to call a couple of our friends, and let them know that she was gone, I promised. She left that evening. I called the friends, two ladies, on that my wife had worked with in Salinas many years ago, and the other a lady we met about 8-10 years ago, and that I am editing books for, over the internet.
The evening after my wife's passing, I am sitting at the dining room table, feel a presence behind me, a hand comes down on my shoulder, I automatically say "I love you too" before I can think, as this is what my wife used to do when she came in from the laundry room, and she would say "I love you" as she put her hand on my shoulder. I distinctly heard "The pain is gone, I can see, I can hear, and I can walk again," and the grief and guilt just exploded out of me, left me totally drained and very jarred!
Long story short, a month after my wife's death, I get a call from the lady in Salinas, telling me she had a letter from my wife for me, to be delivered a month after her death. Told her to mail it, or I would come down and get it - she said she was in town visiting family and would bring it over.
she brought it over, I read it, and in the letter, my wife told me how much she loved me, and how grateful she was for how I took over everything and took care of her the last 8 years because of her being handicapped. She tells me she wants me to be happy, and to find another woman to make as happy as she had been in our 34 years together, and we never had a fight.
Then she tells me that I should date the to other friend, because she is sexy, good looking, and lonely. I am blown away, send the letter to the gal, she says we better check this out, she will be down next month to see her publisher, why don't we have dinner, and talk about all this. So we do. Turns out my wife was right, she is cute, sexy, lonely, and we are so compatible that it is unreal.
So we have seen each other, and here is the really spooky part, in the course of the last four months, I have found 5 letters written by my wife and hidden around the house, in her things that I will have to go through. In each letter except the last, she tells me to date this gal. In each letter she tells me about the other letters, and to look for them, and in the last one I found she says she hopes that I am living with the gal!
This was my wife in 1983 at Pigeon Point Lighthouse California, she was 63, I was 48. We had just started dating.
She told me to call a couple of our friends, and let them know that she was gone, I promised. She left that evening. I called the friends, two ladies, on that my wife had worked with in Salinas many years ago, and the other a lady we met about 8-10 years ago, and that I am editing books for, over the internet.
The evening after my wife's passing, I am sitting at the dining room table, feel a presence behind me, a hand comes down on my shoulder, I automatically say "I love you too" before I can think, as this is what my wife used to do when she came in from the laundry room, and she would say "I love you" as she put her hand on my shoulder. I distinctly heard "The pain is gone, I can see, I can hear, and I can walk again," and the grief and guilt just exploded out of me, left me totally drained and very jarred!
Long story short, a month after my wife's death, I get a call from the lady in Salinas, telling me she had a letter from my wife for me, to be delivered a month after her death. Told her to mail it, or I would come down and get it - she said she was in town visiting family and would bring it over.
she brought it over, I read it, and in the letter, my wife told me how much she loved me, and how grateful she was for how I took over everything and took care of her the last 8 years because of her being handicapped. She tells me she wants me to be happy, and to find another woman to make as happy as she had been in our 34 years together, and we never had a fight.
Then she tells me that I should date the to other friend, because she is sexy, good looking, and lonely. I am blown away, send the letter to the gal, she says we better check this out, she will be down next month to see her publisher, why don't we have dinner, and talk about all this. So we do. Turns out my wife was right, she is cute, sexy, lonely, and we are so compatible that it is unreal.
So we have seen each other, and here is the really spooky part, in the course of the last four months, I have found 5 letters written by my wife and hidden around the house, in her things that I will have to go through. In each letter except the last, she tells me to date this gal. In each letter she tells me about the other letters, and to look for them, and in the last one I found she says she hopes that I am living with the gal!
This was my wife in 1983 at Pigeon Point Lighthouse California, she was 63, I was 48. We had just started dating.
My wife at Pigeon Point Lighthouse
Jan 4, 2017 13:13:36 #
I'm sorry for your loss. What a heartwarming story. Your wife was nice looking as well.
Jan 4, 2017 13:27:45 #
I am completely blown away by your story. What a wonderful woman to be thinking of you when she was in constant pain. I hope you two find happiness.
Jan 4, 2017 13:45:07 #
What a beautiful love story. You were married to a truly exceptional woman. God's blessings to you as you go forward...maybe with this friend????
Jan 4, 2017 13:53:42 #
Jan 4, 2017 14:02:52 #
Thank you what a wonderful and touching story thank you for sharing and welcome back.
SmittyOne wrote:
Had to be off General Chit-Chat for a while, wife ... (show quote)
Jan 4, 2017 15:19:50 #
Thank you for sharing your experience and I'm sorry for your loss, you two will eventually be together again.
Part of your experience reminded me of something my wife and I experienced the day my mother passed away. My mother was in her mid-80’s and had been living in an assisted care home. We visited her quite often, no less than 4 times a week and took her places when possible. She was suffering from a condition called esophageal scleroderma (ES) which I’m told can be very painful but mom never complained about being in pain. She always enjoyed our visits and especially enjoyed when my wife stopped by to see her during the day. My wife worked for the local blood lab and was the visiting phlebotomist at the home. My wife is my second wife and mom was not real fond of my first wife, but my second wife could do no wrong. Anyway, it was late winter several years ago and mom ended up in the hospital with pneumonia. The ES had advanced to the point where mom could no longer swallow and although she knew her remaining days were few, she was in good spirits and being a religious woman, was looking forward to the next adventure and being reunited with her husband and family and friends that has left this earth before her. We gathered as many friends and family together as possible on short notice and they all had the opportunity to say good bye. That night mom lost consciousness and my wife and I stayed with her so she wouldn’t be alone. There were only the 3 of us in the room but both my wife and myself has the feeling there were more. At one point mom appeared to regain consciousness and she appeared to recognize other people in the room like her husband (my father) and her brother, both of whom had passed years before. Again she lost consciousness and never spoke another word. The nurse said it was just a matter of time before her heart would fail and as we had been at the hospital since Sunday morning, it was now around 4:00 am on Tuesday, to go home and get a few hours rest and if the heart monitor indicated imminent failure, she’d call us, so we went home, about a 15 minute drive from the hospital. Around 7:00 am we got a call from the hospital telling us to come back. My wife went down stairs to make coffee and I jumped in the shower. As I was dressing a few minutes later I heard someone calling me. I thought it was my wife downstairs calling me to tell me the coffee was ready. At the same time my wife heard someone calling her and she figured it was me telling her the shower was empty. Basically we answered each other only to discover she had not called me and I had not called her. It was around 7:10 Tuesday morning. We got back to the hospital around 7:35 and went to moms room. The nurse was there, she informed us mom’s heart stopped around 7:10. After that experience I believe in things I was skeptical about before.
Part of your experience reminded me of something my wife and I experienced the day my mother passed away. My mother was in her mid-80’s and had been living in an assisted care home. We visited her quite often, no less than 4 times a week and took her places when possible. She was suffering from a condition called esophageal scleroderma (ES) which I’m told can be very painful but mom never complained about being in pain. She always enjoyed our visits and especially enjoyed when my wife stopped by to see her during the day. My wife worked for the local blood lab and was the visiting phlebotomist at the home. My wife is my second wife and mom was not real fond of my first wife, but my second wife could do no wrong. Anyway, it was late winter several years ago and mom ended up in the hospital with pneumonia. The ES had advanced to the point where mom could no longer swallow and although she knew her remaining days were few, she was in good spirits and being a religious woman, was looking forward to the next adventure and being reunited with her husband and family and friends that has left this earth before her. We gathered as many friends and family together as possible on short notice and they all had the opportunity to say good bye. That night mom lost consciousness and my wife and I stayed with her so she wouldn’t be alone. There were only the 3 of us in the room but both my wife and myself has the feeling there were more. At one point mom appeared to regain consciousness and she appeared to recognize other people in the room like her husband (my father) and her brother, both of whom had passed years before. Again she lost consciousness and never spoke another word. The nurse said it was just a matter of time before her heart would fail and as we had been at the hospital since Sunday morning, it was now around 4:00 am on Tuesday, to go home and get a few hours rest and if the heart monitor indicated imminent failure, she’d call us, so we went home, about a 15 minute drive from the hospital. Around 7:00 am we got a call from the hospital telling us to come back. My wife went down stairs to make coffee and I jumped in the shower. As I was dressing a few minutes later I heard someone calling me. I thought it was my wife downstairs calling me to tell me the coffee was ready. At the same time my wife heard someone calling her and she figured it was me telling her the shower was empty. Basically we answered each other only to discover she had not called me and I had not called her. It was around 7:10 Tuesday morning. We got back to the hospital around 7:35 and went to moms room. The nurse was there, she informed us mom’s heart stopped around 7:10. After that experience I believe in things I was skeptical about before.
Jan 4, 2017 15:55:35 #
I have no difficulty accepting what you have experienced. My wife has been back at least three times, once in church where she was seen as a glow standing behind me with a hand on my shoulder (which I had felt), and I heard the words "Make her as happy as you made me". On New Years Eve, my new lady was resting in bed waiting for the ball to drop, I was out here in the dining room where the TV is, (I had strep throat, and my cough was keeping her awake) when she came out and said "She is here, she pulled the covers off and told me to come out and get you to rest up for the ball drop." I told my wife that we were adults, we could handle it and she could relax and enjoy her new life, she didn't have to look after us. There was a swirl of air (in a closed room), and we both heard a chuckle, then everything was quiet. My new lady said "Well, she is gone."
My new lady
Jan 4, 2017 15:56:18 #
How wonderful to have such a love such as you had. I can only wish for 1/2 of your experience.
Sarge69
Sarge69
Jan 4, 2017 16:05:10 #
We already are, as she said, we better do what she says, or she will come back and kick our butts! Probably true, too. Yes, remarkable woman, loved her dearly, and it was returned. So, now I am broken in, and well trained. Ha. My new lady is in awe of the whole situation, fortunately, we are both pretty well versed in metaphysics, and I have had a couple of N.D.E.'s (Near Death Experiences), and went on the other side and talked with the being of Light at age 14, so know where she is. Now have to get on with this life, as I would have wanted her to do, had it been me that crossed over.
Jan 5, 2017 07:58:29 #
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