silverhawk Loc: Born a West Virginian, Living in Virginia

'nother email I'm sharing to put a smile on your face........ :mrgreen:


THOUGHTS BY ’DUCKY’

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I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with ‘Guess’ on it. So I said ‘Implants?’

She hit me.

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How come we choose from just two people to run for president

and over fifty for Miss America ?

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Marriage changes passion.
Suddenly you’re in bed with a relative.

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Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can’t even get into my own pants.

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I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing.

If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn’t have signed up in the first place!

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When I was young we used to go ‘skinny dipping.’

Now I just ‘chunky dunk.’

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Don’t argue with an idiot;

people watching may not be able to tell the difference.

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Wouldn’t it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press ‘Ctrl Alt Delete’ and start all over? AMEN!

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Why is it that our children can’t read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?
A completely brilliant question!

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Wouldn’t you know it...
Brain cells come and brain cells go,

But FAT cells live forever.

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Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court

when the Ten Commandments cannot be displayed outside?
Another completely brilliant question!

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Bumper sticker of the year: ‘If you can read this, thank a teacher –

and since it’s in English, thank a soldier’

And remember:
Life is like a roll of toilet paper.
The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes!

Ya’ just might want to pass this along...

jerryc41 Loc: Catskill Mts of NY

:thumbup:

jaymatt Loc: Alexandria, Indiana

:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup:

jack schade Loc: La Pine Oregon

Great stuff!!! Thanks for the post.

Jack