Points to ponder.
Feb 13, 2015 11:37:13 #
NeilL
Loc: British-born Canadian
OLD AGE
Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice!!!
I don't have gray hair. I have "wisdom highlights". I'm just very wise.
I don't need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off!
My people skills are just fine. It's my tolerance to idiots that needs work.
Even duct tape can't fix stupid ... but it can muffle the sound!
I'm going to retire and live off of my savings. Not sure what I'll do that second week.
The kids text me "plz" which is shorter than please. I text back "no" which is shorter than "yes".
Oops! Did I roll my eyes out loud?
I don't trip over things, I do random gravity checks!
The biggest lie I tell myself is ..."I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."
If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would've put them on my knees.
Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes; come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller!
Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven't met yet!
Old age is coming at a really bad time!
Lord grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can & the friends to post my bail when I finally snap!
Teach your daughter how to shoot, because a restraining order is just a piece of paper.
When did it change from "We the people" to "screw the people" ?
Why do I have to press one for English when you're just gonna transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?
At my age "Getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering what I came in for.
Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice!!!
I don't have gray hair. I have "wisdom highlights". I'm just very wise.
I don't need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off!
My people skills are just fine. It's my tolerance to idiots that needs work.
Even duct tape can't fix stupid ... but it can muffle the sound!
I'm going to retire and live off of my savings. Not sure what I'll do that second week.
The kids text me "plz" which is shorter than please. I text back "no" which is shorter than "yes".
Oops! Did I roll my eyes out loud?
I don't trip over things, I do random gravity checks!
The biggest lie I tell myself is ..."I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."
If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would've put them on my knees.
Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes; come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller!
Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven't met yet!
Old age is coming at a really bad time!
Lord grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can & the friends to post my bail when I finally snap!
Teach your daughter how to shoot, because a restraining order is just a piece of paper.
When did it change from "We the people" to "screw the people" ?
Why do I have to press one for English when you're just gonna transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?
At my age "Getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering what I came in for.
Feb 13, 2015 17:36:25 #
Let me add:
Local gravity variations seem to be increasing. I detect them when I get up off the floor.
I don't have gray hair. It's pewter.
Old age ain't wonderful, but its better than the alternative!
Local gravity variations seem to be increasing. I detect them when I get up off the floor.
I don't have gray hair. It's pewter.
Old age ain't wonderful, but its better than the alternative!
Feb 13, 2015 17:57:30 #
NeilL
Loc: British-born Canadian
GeorgeH wrote:
Let me add:
Local gravity variations seem to be increasing. I detect them when I get up off the floor.
I don't have gray hair. It's pewter.
Old age ain't wonderful, but its better than the alternative!
Local gravity variations seem to be increasing. I detect them when I get up off the floor.
I don't have gray hair. It's pewter.
Old age ain't wonderful, but its better than the alternative!
You got it, George.
Feb 14, 2015 08:53:51 #
Geofw
Loc: Thornton Cleveleys UK
I can relate to all of them, do you mind if I send it to friends?
NeilL wrote:
OLD AGE br br Of course I talk to myself, some... (show quote)
Feb 14, 2015 10:01:40 #
Feb 14, 2015 11:16:17 #
NeilL
Loc: British-born Canadian
Geofw wrote:
I can relate to all of them, do you mind if I send it to friends?
Heavens above. Please make as many people laugh as possible. We all need it. :thumbup: :thumbup: :-D
Feb 14, 2015 11:16:57 #
NeilL
Loc: British-born Canadian
Martys wrote:
I'm not bald,....I'm just 3 inches taller than my hair.
I'm not overweight - just undertall. :D
Feb 14, 2015 15:18:52 #
I'm going to steal all of them and use the as my signatures on my emails. thank you
Feb 14, 2015 15:21:30 #
NeilL
Loc: British-born Canadian
tenbanshee wrote:
I'm going to steal all of them and use the as my signatures on my emails. thank you
:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: It's not stealing.
Feb 14, 2015 15:33:40 #
Feb 14, 2015 21:30:46 #
Geofw wrote:
I can relate to all of them, do you mind if I send it to friends?
The joys of getting older ( The rest of the page is blank)
Feb 14, 2015 21:31:10 #
boberic wrote:
The joys of getting older ( The rest of the page is blank)
If you want to reply, then register here. Registration is free and your account is created instantly, so you can post right away.