Red Bear

I hate to have to tell you this, but, unfortunately, this story is true. It is not a "gag." The names have been changed to protect the innocent:

My best friend and his (adult) son, took me out to breakfast so we could get together and chat. That happens less and less because they're so busy and I rarely leave my house anymore.

Anyway, I was along for the ride while they ran a few simple and fast errands - and we decided to stop at a McDonald's other than the one three blocks from where we live. It's not real far away, and we all knew some management staff that had been transferred to the other location that we thought that we'd visit with while we were there. Went in, had what we had and were getting ready to leave when we spotted (and were welcomed by) the top manager, "the Big Boss," an old friend.

We went to the table where she was talking to a couple of her "baby managers" and started our usual rather raucous round of communications after exchanging greetings. You know the kinda thing that I mean; manager complained 'cause we didn't leave right away after eating 'cause we were "scaring away good customers." We were complaining about the quality of the "Champagne Breakfast," escargot and hummus at her McDonald's location . . . None of which is sold by McDonald's, of course.

Finally, my friend told her, seriously, that the hand dryer machine in the men's restroom didn't work and she responded that she knew that; repairs had been ordered. Okay, well, by now the "baby managers" had gotten the idea that we were all old friends and (sorta) joined in...two of them, in particular; a young guy and a young gal that looked like really great, sincere and hard-working young people. HAR, HAR, HAR!!! They didn't even have a prayer...like lambs to the slaughter...

The guy said that paper towels were better, but people made a mess with them and made more work for the crew to clean up several times a day. We all agreed. The gal says, "True, but I still like paper towels better than electric blowers". . . A very strange look passed over the face of our friend, “the Big Boss" . . . She has known us for some years. I think that she MAY have considered yelling to the two baby managers, "Run for you lives! NOW! While you still have a chance..." But, she didn't. . .

So, I'm standing there and I look down at the baby managers and said, "I wanna know if you guys have ever noticed something about the people that prefer the electric blower kinda hand driers..." The guy shakes his head and the gal says, "No, what do you mean?"

See how easy it is to "set the hook?"

So, I say, "If you really pay attention to those people, you'll find out that they usually have, in their jackets or purses, or whatever, a short length of collapsible heater hose from an auto parts store."

They look perplexed; they look puzzled by the relevance. Our old friend, “the Big Boss” looks like she knew she shoulda run as soon as she saw us... In fact, she's starting to put a hand to her forehead and look down at the table...

So, I say, "Yup, most public restrooms that have them 'lectric dryers are sought out by them people - they whip out the flexible heater hose, hook it up to the blower output and shove it down their pants! In some cases it's the only thrill that they've ever had..."

By now, my friend and his son are cracking up, but, of course I have no idea why. . .

“The Big Boss” has buried her face in both hands and is slowing shaking her head and sorta moaning. . .I told the gal baby manager, who was suffering some unknown form of heart, respiratory and gastric failure, simultaneously, that she shouldn't worry; ". . .university studies are currently underway to determine if this is ‘equal opportunity’ thing and enjoyed by as many women as men. . ."

She was making these little whimpering noises and the guy baby manager was looking somewhat greenish and uncomfortable.

We said "Good-Bye" to our friend, “the Big Boss,” and walked out.

The End.

Manglesphoto Loc: 70 miles south of St.Louis

LOL

Red Bear

Thanks for that! I swear it's a true story.

jeep_daddy Loc: Prescott AZ

I am so sorry that I read the entire story. My bad.

dljen Loc: Central PA

You are a dog! :oops: :oops: :oops: :oops: :oops: :oops: 8-)

Red Bear

:oops:

Red Bear

Tanque veddy mucho :!:

4ellen4 Loc: GTA--Ontario

thanks for the daily chuckle

Red Bear

:thumbup: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Mesa Dave Loc: Mesa Arizona

Sorry, I didn't find anything even remotely interesting or amusing about this. What did I miss.

MD

Red Bear

Beats me! :roll: