Shakey Loc: Traveling again to Norway and other places.

Actual call center conversations!   


Customer:    I've been calling 0700-1800 for two days and can't get through; can you help?'

Operator:      'Where did you get that number, sir?'

Customer:    'It's on the door of your business.'

Operator:      'Sir, those are the hours that we are open.'
 
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Samsung  Electronics 

Caller: 'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?'

Operator:  'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking  about.'

Caller: 'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly  states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC  wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?'
 
Operator: 'I think it means the telephone plug on the  wall.'
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Motoring Services 
Caller:  'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am  traveling in Australia ?'
Operator:  'Does the policy name give you a  clue?'
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Caller  (enquiring about legal requirements while traveling in Europe )
 
'If I register my car in France , and then take it to  England , do I have to change the steering  wheel to the other side of the car?'
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 Directory  Enquiries 
 Caller: 'I'd like the number of the Argo Fish Bar, please'
Operator:  'I'm sorry, there's no listing.  Are you sure that  the spelling is correct?'
 Caller:  'Well, it used to be called the Bargo Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off.'
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Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
Operator:  'Woven?  Are you sure?'
Caller:  'Yes.  That's what it says on the label -- Woven in Scotland .'
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On  another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator:
'I  haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to  write the number on.'
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  Tech  Support:  'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.'
Customer:   'OK.'
Tech Support:  'Did you get a pop-up  menu?'
Customer: 'No.'
Tech Support: 'OK. Right-Click again.  Do you see a pop-up menu?'
Customer: 'No.'
Tech Support: 'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?'
Customer: 'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'.'
Tech Support:  'OK.  At the bottom left hand side of your screen, can you see the 'OK'  button displayed?'
 Customer:  'Wow!  How can you see my screen from there?'
Tech Support: 'No, what is your problem, sir?'
Caller:  'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I just realized that I need it.  So, if I turn my system clock back two weeks will I get my file back again?'
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This has to be one of  the funniest things in a long time.  I think this  guy should have been promoted, not fired.  This is  a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was  transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department.  Needless to say the Help Desk  employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for 'Termination without Cause.' (It's on the Internet so it must be true.)

Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.
(Now I know why they record these conversations!)

Operator:  'Ridge  Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'
Caller:      'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect  .'

Operator:  'What sort of trouble?'
Caller:      'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the  words went away.'

Operator:   'Went away?'
Caller:      'They disappeared'

Operator:  'Hmm.  So what does your screen look like now?'
Caller:      'Nothing.'

Operator:  'Nothing??'
Caller:      'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'

Operator:   'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?'
Caller:      'How do I tell?'

Operator:   'Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen?'
Caller:        'What's a sea-prompt?'

Operator:  'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'
Caller:      'There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type.'

Operator:  'Does your monitor have a power  indicator?'
Caller:      'What's a monitor?'

Operator:  'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.  Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?'

Caller:    'I don't know.'

Operator:  'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it.  Can you see that?'

Caller:    'Yes, I think so.'

Operator:  'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
 
Caller:    'Yes, it is.'
Operator:  'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that  there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not  just one?'
 
Caller:    'No.'

Operator:   'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.'
Caller:    'Okay, here it is.'

Operator:  'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.'

Caller:  'I can't reach.'

Operator:   'OK. Well, can you see if it  is?'

Caller:        'No.'

Operator:   'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?'

Caller:      'Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's because it's dark.'

Operator:   'Dark?'

Caller:      'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.'

Operator:   'Well, turn on the office light then.'

Caller:       'I can't.'

Operator:  'No?  Why not?'

Caller:      ' Because there's a power failure..'

Operator:  'A power .... A power failure?    Aha.  Okay, we've got it licked  now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that  your computer came in?'

Caller:   'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'

Operator:  'Good.  Go get them, and unplug your system and  pack it up just like it was when you got it.  Then take it back to the store you bought it from.'

Caller:    'Really?  Is it that bad?'

Operator:  'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'

Caller:      'Well, all right then, I suppose.  What do I tell them?'

Operator:  'Tell them you're too stupid to own a  computer!'

GW Loc: Idaho

Sadly enough I know people like that....good one...I threw my box away , what do I do now ?.............

Black Bart Loc: Indiana

I built mine who do I call when it won't work. :XD:

JAW Loc: LA

Would a mirror help? :oops: :idea:

Black Bart Loc: Indiana

Yea for tech support I dial 800 U812

venturer9 Loc: Newton, Il.

Directory Enquiries
Caller: 'I'd like the number of the Argo Fish Bar, please'
Operator: 'I'm sorry, there's no listing. Are you sure that the spelling is correct?'
Caller: 'Well, it used to be called the Bargo Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off.'

about 25yrs ago I was to meet a man at the "Esso" Gas Station in Henderson, Ky. The gentleman gave me directions and after trying for almost half hour.. I finally gave up and stopped at a 7-11 convenience store.. Well sir, you came right by it, it is across the street from the Bowling Alley... OK.. went back to the Bowling Alley, (Knew where it was) no ESSO gas Station.. BUT there was a red pickup truck parked across the street in front of an old beat up building. Went over, it was the guy, I asked "I thought you were supposed to be at the Esso Gas Station. He looked puzzled for a min, looked around and said..> WELL IT USED TO BE THE ESS) GAS STATION....<

phcaan Loc: Willow Springs, MO

I have used the mirror, sadly the clown looking back at me was as dumb as I was.

:-D

JAW Loc: LA

Somehow I don't believe that!