FrumCA

MY LAST TRIP TO COSTCO

Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina
dog chow for my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog and was in the
check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant? So since I'm retired and
have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I
was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my
orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that
it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply
eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here
that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's butt and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he
was Laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore.

Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in
the World to think of crazy things to say.

Photo Girl Loc: SE Pasco County, FL

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

tlbuljac Loc: Oklahoma

This has been on here so many times now its ridiculous...I first told it March 2012

Photo Girl Loc: SE Pasco County, FL

I wasn't a member in March, 2012, so I couldn't have seen it. Sorry, but I enjoyed it now. Thanks for the story.

F16 Club

Perhaps, you read much Mark Twain novels!
Excelent. :thumbup: :mrgreen:

UP-2-IT Loc: RED STICK, LA

Damn, a full cup of coffee in my keyboard!

flyguy Loc: Las Cruces, New Mexico

Still very funny no matter how many times it's been posted. :lol: :lol: :lol:

HEART Loc: God's Country - COLORADO

Costco has since moved the dog food to the diet food section.

flyguy Loc: Las Cruces, New Mexico

I've been reducing my weight lately and I'm leaving on a shopping trip to Costco in about an hour, maybe I'll put that on my list. :twisted:

cday Loc: North Carolina

I shall have to remember this the next time I buy cat food...but then, it won't work because I'm not retired...yet.....

Pepsiman Loc: New York City

You may have told it but did you post it :?:

Jblanke Loc: Metairie, LA

You are a good man, Frum. Hats off to ya!!

Rabbott Loc: Grass Valley , California

what are you,,,, the joke police.??? :)

kemosabe

Don't care how many times they were on here, if they are funny, then enjoy the laugh. Thanks

Shutterbug_11 Loc: Yucaipa, CA

This is just too hilarious! Thanks for posting and sharing it! I also have never seen this story either, so of course I got a good laugh after reading the entire story. Yes, I guess people should be careful about what they say to retired folks, after all, as you say ... they have all the time in the world to think up funny comments like this! Good going FrumCA !! :thumbup: You get my vote and I'm not even retired yet! I'm glad everyone in the line listening to your story got a good laugh! :) Although I can't understand why Costco won't let you shop there anymore. Maybe they thought the laughter was too distracting!! I also shop at Costco, where I get my prints made. :-)