just pondering
Mar 23, 2013 17:38:40 #
1. If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times,
does he become disoriented?
2. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from
Holland called Holes?
3. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
4. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
5. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
6. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
7. When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
8. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person
who drives a racing car not called a racist?
9. Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
10. Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
11. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?
12. 'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language.
Could it be that 'I do' is the longest sentence?
13. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow
that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged,
models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
14. What hair colour do they put on the driver's license's of bald men?
15. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little
spoons and forks so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
16. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What
are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their
pictures on the postage stamps so the postmen can look for them while
they deliver the mail?
17. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
18. No one ever says, 'It's only a game' when their team is winning.
19. Ever wonder about those people who spend £1.50 apiece on those
little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE
20. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing
section in a swimming pool?
21. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhoea , does that mean that one
enjoys it
does he become disoriented?
2. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from
Holland called Holes?
3. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
4. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
5. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
6. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
7. When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
8. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person
who drives a racing car not called a racist?
9. Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
10. Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
11. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?
12. 'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language.
Could it be that 'I do' is the longest sentence?
13. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow
that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged,
models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
14. What hair colour do they put on the driver's license's of bald men?
15. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little
spoons and forks so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
16. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What
are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their
pictures on the postage stamps so the postmen can look for them while
they deliver the mail?
17. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
18. No one ever says, 'It's only a game' when their team is winning.
19. Ever wonder about those people who spend £1.50 apiece on those
little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE
20. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing
section in a swimming pool?
21. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhoea , does that mean that one
enjoys it
Mar 23, 2013 19:36:59 #
Mar 24, 2013 08:35:11 #
Hi Johno35, that was pretty funny. Keep them coming if you can.
Mar 24, 2013 08:38:55 #
17. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
As a driving instructor this is very true. My student find words that I've never heard before.
As a driving instructor this is very true. My student find words that I've never heard before.
Mar 24, 2013 08:40:46 #
Mar 24, 2013 08:43:59 #
Mar 24, 2013 08:56:16 #
Its like a piggy bank Kaz, and when one of your students utters an obscenity you make them put some coins in the box, some pubs over here do it, and then send the contents off to a good cause. Make sure you tell them beforehand..you never know
you may get through the day "swear" free!!
you may get through the day "swear" free!!
Mar 24, 2013 08:58:15 #
oh is that what it is. I'd go broke myself between students.
Thanks for the info
Thanks for the info
Mar 24, 2013 09:06:26 #
Mar 24, 2013 15:17:18 #
Mar 27, 2013 01:59:45 #
Michael O'
Loc: Midwest right now
I pronounce day 21 of the month as the twenty oneth.
Doesn't everyone ?
Doesn't everyone ?
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