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Naval Humour
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Nov 3, 2012 09:08:22   #
jjwright71 Loc: Lubbock,Tx
 
donrent wrote:
You know, I just do not go along with that little tale being real...
For one thing, a lighthouse is on Land... Land shows up extremly good on Radar... Every vessel in that group HAS radar and believe me, radar operators are very adapt at telling the diff between land and another ship....
Nope, don't believe a word of that story...
see there is always that 10% that get offended ,gets it worng ,takes it wrong ,lives for it to be wrong ,unfortunally we gots a pres that way ,and most major leaders are that way!!!!!

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Nov 3, 2012 10:11:01   #
kschwegl Loc: Orangeburg, NY
 
Waterback wrote:
This is the actual radio conversation (released by the chief of naval operations) of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995.


CANADIANS: "Please divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision"


AMERICANS: "Recommend YOU divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision"


CANADIANS: "Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision"


AMERICANS: "This is the captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course"


CANADIANS: "No, I say again, you divert your course"


AMERICANS: "This is the Aircraft Carrier USS LINCOLN, the second largest ship in the United States Atlantic Fleet. We are accompanied with three Destroyers, three Cruisers and numerous support vessels. I DEMAND that you change your course 15 degrees north. I say again, that's one-five degrees north, or counter-measures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship"


CANADIANS: "This is a LIGHTHOUSE. Your call"
This is the actual radio conversation (released by... (show quote)


I'm ex U.S. Navy and I thought it was funny as hell. Took it for what is was, a joke. Just like the NASA engineers pulling their hair out trying to develop a pen that works in zero gravity. A Canadian engineer said "Use a pencil"!

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Nov 3, 2012 10:45:56   #
Duane D. Loc: Kalkaska, Michigan
 
I am a former Navy man and thought it was pretty funny but not true as stated. Good for a laugh this morning. Everyone have a nice day.
Duane D.

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Nov 3, 2012 10:56:56   #
Martys Loc: Lubec, Maine
 
Never let the truth get in the way of a good story !

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Nov 3, 2012 12:57:31   #
ngc1514 Loc: Atlanta, Ga., Lancaster, Oh. and Stuart, Fl.
 
Waterback wrote:
Okay, next time I post a joke I'll start out "This really didn't happen, so don't bother reading it". Will that make it clear?

Just omitting the intro would have made the whole thing more amusing.

That and had it been a fresher joke. The carrier vs. lighthouse joke goes back at least 70 years.

Reading the jokes posted here, I don't think a new joke has been written in decades.

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Nov 3, 2012 13:03:00   #
BW326 Loc: Boynton Beach, Florida
 
I've heard it before.. still makes me laugh!

:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup:

BTW, I think 90% of all the really funny military stories are either made up or rely upon great exaggeration.

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Nov 3, 2012 13:05:18   #
UP-2-IT Loc: RED STICK, LA
 
Waterback wrote:
This is the actual radio conversation (released by the chief of naval operations) of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995.


CANADIANS: "Please divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision"


AMERICANS: "Recommend YOU divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision"


CANADIANS: "Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision"


AMERICANS: "This is the captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course"


CANADIANS: "No, I say again, you divert your course"


AMERICANS: "This is the Aircraft Carrier USS LINCOLN, the second largest ship in the United States Atlantic Fleet. We are accompanied with three Destroyers, three Cruisers and numerous support vessels. I DEMAND that you change your course 15 degrees north. I say again, that's one-five degrees north, or counter-measures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship"


CANADIANS: "This is a LIGHTHOUSE. Your call"
This is the actual radio conversation (released by... (show quote)


This is a link to the video on Utube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZD62OhaDTI&feature=related

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Nov 3, 2012 13:08:38   #
jolly1
 
donrent wrote:
You know, I just do not go along with that little tale being real...
For one thing, a lighthouse is on Land... Land shows up extremly good on Radar... Every vessel in that group HAS radar and believe me, radar operators are very adapt at telling the diff between land and another ship....
Nope, don't believe a word of that story...



No sense of humor, huh!?!

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Nov 3, 2012 13:14:44   #
jolly1
 
I first heard this joke, and a good joke it is, in 2000, and I still think its funny. I'm an old Navy man too.

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Nov 3, 2012 14:15:14   #
Robbie7 Loc: Northampton. England
 
Hey donrent, lighten up for goodness sake. A good joke is just that, we all have to have the ability to laugh at ourselves don't we. We British constantly take one at ourselves we know we're not perfect and neither is anyone else..I watched the utube version and it typified a particular type of arrogance found in all nations..I found it funny thankyou Waterback..:-)

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Nov 3, 2012 14:42:23   #
Lmarc Loc: Ojojona, Honduras
 
Robbie7 wrote:
Hey donrent, lighten up for goodness sake. A good joke is just that, we all have to have the ability to laugh at ourselves don't we. We British constantly take one at ourselves we know we're not perfect and neither is anyone else..I watched the utube version and it typified a particular type of arrogance found in all nations..I found it funny thankyou Waterback..:-)


It's these darn kids these days! Consarned young whipper-snappers think they own the world! Didn't act that way back in '17. If I were 70 again I'd TAN THEIR HIDES!

Sense of humor!??!? I'LL LEARN 'EM who's got a sense of humor!!

Sense of humor???
Sense of humor???...

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Nov 3, 2012 15:56:30   #
A10 Loc: Southern Indiana
 
Funny is good.

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Nov 3, 2012 16:03:14   #
UP-2-IT Loc: RED STICK, LA
 
kschwegl wrote:
Waterback wrote:
This is the actual radio conversation (released by the chief of naval operations) of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995.


CANADIANS: "Please divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision"


AMERICANS: "Recommend YOU divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision"


CANADIANS: "Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision"


AMERICANS: "This is the captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course"


CANADIANS: "No, I say again, you divert your course"


AMERICANS: "This is the Aircraft Carrier USS LINCOLN, the second largest ship in the United States Atlantic Fleet. We are accompanied with three Destroyers, three Cruisers and numerous support vessels. I DEMAND that you change your course 15 degrees north. I say again, that's one-five degrees north, or counter-measures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship"


CANADIANS: "This is a LIGHTHOUSE. Your call"
This is the actual radio conversation (released by... (show quote)


I'm ex U.S. Navy and I thought it was funny as hell. Took it for what is was, a joke. Just like the NASA engineers pulling their hair out trying to develop a pen that works in zero gravity. A Canadian engineer said "Use a pencil"!
quote=Waterback This is the actual radio conversa... (show quote)


Why, they had a pen already

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Nov 3, 2012 16:06:30   #
UP-2-IT Loc: RED STICK, LA
 
Waterback wrote:
This is the actual radio conversation (released by the chief of naval operations) of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995.


CANADIANS: "Please divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision"


AMERICANS: "Recommend YOU divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision"


CANADIANS: "Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision"


AMERICANS: "This is the captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course"


CANADIANS: "No, I say again, you divert your course"


AMERICANS: "This is the Aircraft Carrier USS LINCOLN, the second largest ship in the United States Atlantic Fleet. We are accompanied with three Destroyers, three Cruisers and numerous support vessels. I DEMAND that you change your course 15 degrees north. I say again, that's one-five degrees north, or counter-measures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship"


CANADIANS: "This is a LIGHTHOUSE. Your call"
This is the actual radio conversation (released by... (show quote)


Why say actual, why say carrier and why say Canada? If your gonna tell a joke at least get it right. It's been around for over 50 years good grief.

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Nov 3, 2012 16:08:19   #
UP-2-IT Loc: RED STICK, LA
 
donrent wrote:
Sorry, I took it for what I read it as: BULLSHIT AND NOT HUMEROUS..............


:thumbup: :thumbup:

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