A hush has fallen over the crowd gathered here in Ministry Operations. Altho the fleet has been put up for sale and MilkBone Dog Biscuit ransom was paid last night after the hamster fight in the parking lot behind Stop 'n' Shop (it was an historic contest--the first ever to last the full fifteen rounds), his captors have not lived up to their agreement to let Eisenheim the Magnificent go, and the Martian is furious.

Madame P, her Peruvian Piranha Dog, Chopper, and a very capable agent loaned to us from the Northern Division's Seal Team 9-Lives are on the way to attempt his rescue, but we've had no news from them in the last couple of days.

Our only link with the furry victim is Madame P's crystal iBall, and from what we can see, he's being tortured. It's inhumane--they're only letting him sleep twenty-two hours a day, and feeding him puppy chow. And no kitty treats either, the dirty dogs!

Of more concern is the latest glimpse we've had of him as the iBall's ether has cleared a bit and shown us a most disturbing sight--Eisenheim is about to launch his own bid for freedom! Clearly the conditions are more than he can endure--we've seen it before--that familiar wide-armed spread formation is a prelude to his full-out attack! Those razor-sharp claws and fangs are about to be deployed, and unless his captors are wearing protective heavy leather, thousands may be killed or maimed, unless Madame P and co. can get there first!

But where is she and her team?

A hush has fallen over the crowd gathered here in Ministry Operations. Altho the fleet has been put up for sale and MilkBone Dog Biscuit ransom was paid last night after the hamster fight in the parking lot behind Stop 'n' Shop (it was an historic contest--the first ever to last the full fifteen rounds), his captors have not lived up to their agreement to let Eisenheim the Magnificent go, and the Martian is furious.

Madame P, her Peruvian Piranha Dog, Chopper, and a very capable agent loaned to us from the Northern Division's Seal Team 9-Lives are on the way to attempt his rescue, but we've had no news from them in the last couple of days.

Our only link with the furry victim is Madame P's crystal iBall, and from what we can see, he's being tortured. It's inhumane--they're only letting him sleep twenty-two hours a day, and feeding him puppy chow. And no kitty treats either, the dirty dogs!

Of more concern is the latest glimpse we've had of him as the iBall's ether has cleared a bit and shown us a most disturbing sight--Eisenheim is about to launch his own bid for freedom! Clearly the conditions are more than he can endure--we've seen it before--that familiar wide-armed spread formation is a prelude to his full-out attack! Those razor-sharp claws and fangs are about to be deployed, and unless his captors are wearing protective heavy leather, thousands may be killed or maimed, unless Madame P and co. can get there first!

But where is she and her team?

A hush has fallen over the crowd gathered here in Ministry Operations. Altho the fleet has been put up for sale and MilkBone Dog Biscuit ransom was paid last night after the hamster fight in the parking lot behind Stop 'n' Shop (it was an historic contest--the first ever to last the full fifteen rounds), his captors have not lived up to their agreement to let Eisenheim the Magnificent go, and the Martian is furious.

Madame P, her Peruvian Piranha Dog, Chopper, and a very capable agent loaned to us from the Northern Division's Seal Team 9-Lives are on the way to attempt his rescue, but we've had no news from them in the last couple of days.

Our only link with the furry victim is Madame P's crystal iBall, and from what we can see, he's being tortured. It's inhumane--they're only letting him sleep twenty-two hours a day, and feeding him puppy chow. And no kitty treats either, the dirty dogs!

Of more concern is the latest glimpse we've had of him as the iBall's ether has cleared a bit and shown us a most disturbing sight--Eisenheim is about to launch his own bid for freedom! Clearly the conditions are more than he can endure--we've seen it before--that familiar wide-armed spread formation is a prelude to his full-out attack! Those razor-sharp claws and fangs are about to be deployed, and unless his captors are wearing protective heavy leather, thousands may be killed or maimed, unless Madame P and co. can get there first!

But where is she and her team?

I have been thinking about this for a while. I think it just may be scam. Cats are sneaky. They are much smarter than we bi peds. They let us think we run the show. We think that purring is sweet, it is actually a cats way of laughing at our delusion of superiority. Eisenheim may not be in any danger at all. He probably just took a few days off and is snuggled up with his best blankie, watching all thgis foolisness on his I pad. I.m sure he has placed hidden cameras all over the ministry. You will never find them. He has planted clues to his "Catnapping" to make us all think he is in terrible danger. Maybe it would be best if you call off the dogs(pun intended) and defuse the situation. He will be back as soon as he realizes that you are no longer looking for him. He certainly has balls. Crystal balls. The saga continues. Think I will go to sleep now (its 1:30 am)