Annual check-up - joke: During my annual check-up I asked the Doctor, "Do you think I'll live a long and healthy life then?" He replied, "I doubt it somehow. Mercury is in Uranus right...

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Annual check-up - joke

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Mar 5, 2018 19:07:30 #

PaulG Loc: Western Australia

During my annual check-up I asked the Doctor, "Do you think I'll live a long and healthy life then?"
He replied, "I doubt it somehow. Mercury is in Uranus right now."
I said, "I don't go in for any of that astrology bullshit nonsense."
He replied, "Neither do I. My thermometer just broke."

Mar 5, 2018 19:22:38 #

Dan Downie Loc: Rochester, NY

Hahaha! And, ouch! That's more than slight discomfort.

Mar 5, 2018 19:26:10 #

pounder35 Loc: "Southeast of Disorder"

PaulG wrote:

That was definitely a LOL post.

Mar 5, 2018 19:32:21 #

DaveO Loc: Northeast CT

Very good!

Mar 5, 2018 20:04:56 #

cameranut Loc: North Carolina

I actually had one break into in my mouth when I was a kid.
Scared me half to death until I found out that it wasn't the same mercury that is highly toxic.

Mar 5, 2018 20:57:22 #

LWW Loc: Banana Republic of America

I went to see the doctor.

He said Ive got 30 days to live, that'll be $500.

I said I didn't have $500.

He gave me another 30 days.

Mar 5, 2018 22:23:09 #

pounder35 Loc: "Southeast of Disorder"

cameranut wrote:

I actually had one break into in my mouth when I was a kid.
Scared me half to death until I found out that it wasn't the same mercury that is highly toxic.

I didn't know there were different types of mercury. Doesn't matter. I don't want to swallow any of it. Just being cautious. When the Dairy Queen comes out with mercury ice cream maybe I'll give it a shot.

Mar 6, 2018 03:22:27 #

Leicaflex Loc: Cymru

Mar 6, 2018 03:40:44 #

Doddy Loc: Barnard Castle-England

Thats a Bum joke Paul..lol.

Mar 6, 2018 08:49:58 #

jaymatt Loc: Alexandria, Indiana

Mar 6, 2018 10:04:19 #

1Feathercrest Loc: NEPA

There aren't "different types of mercury". Mercury hasn't been used in thermometers for G*d only knows how long. Thermometers are filled with an colored alcohol.

Mar 6, 2018 11:18:52 #

ebbote Loc: Hockley, Texas

Funny, good one.

Mar 6, 2018 14:39:10 #

bellgamin Loc: Ewa Beach, Hawaii

When I was a kid, I broke a thermometer on purpose. We kids used the mercury to turn pennies silver. Did it with our bare hands. I'm not dead yet, as far as I can tell, so ... what went right?

Mar 9, 2018 10:10:44 #

Tikva Loc: Waukesha, WI

That was a good one. Needed a chuckle this morning.

Mar 11, 2018 18:29:07 #

DickC Loc: NE Washington state

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