When Insults had some intelligence
Jul 31, 2017 05:22:31 #
Most of the insults here have little or no intelligence. They'll know who I mean.
When Insults Had Class
These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words. They have done the rounds before, but they are still comedy gold!!
A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.”
"That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
"He had delusions of adequacy ." -Walter Kerr
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." -Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." -William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." -Moses Hadas
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." -Mark Twain
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." -Oscar Wilde
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one." -George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one." -Winston Churchill, in response
"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." -Stephen Bishop
"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." -John Bright
"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." -Irvin S. Cobb
"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." -Samuel Johnson
"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." -Charles, Count Talleyrand
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." -Forrest Tucker
"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" -Mark Twain
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." -Mae West
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." -Oscar Wilde
"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." -Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." -Billy Wilder
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But I'm afraid this wasn't it." -Groucho Marx
“My, you’re ugly madam”, Winston Churchill to Lady Astor.
“And you Sir, are drunk…” Lady Astor in Response
“Yes but I will be sober in the morning!”, Churchill’s Reply.
When Insults Had Class
These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words. They have done the rounds before, but they are still comedy gold!!
A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.”
"That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
"He had delusions of adequacy ." -Walter Kerr
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." -Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." -William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." -Moses Hadas
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." -Mark Twain
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." -Oscar Wilde
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one." -George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one." -Winston Churchill, in response
"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." -Stephen Bishop
"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." -John Bright
"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." -Irvin S. Cobb
"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." -Samuel Johnson
"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." -Charles, Count Talleyrand
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." -Forrest Tucker
"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" -Mark Twain
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." -Mae West
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." -Oscar Wilde
"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." -Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." -Billy Wilder
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But I'm afraid this wasn't it." -Groucho Marx
“My, you’re ugly madam”, Winston Churchill to Lady Astor.
“And you Sir, are drunk…” Lady Astor in Response
“Yes but I will be sober in the morning!”, Churchill’s Reply.
Jul 31, 2017 05:48:56 #
Jul 31, 2017 06:10:28 #
Jul 31, 2017 06:28:11 #
Jul 31, 2017 06:29:15 #
Jul 31, 2017 06:29:17 #
"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." -Samuel Johnson
I have been looking for the cause of the malaise one feels when visiting the For Your Consideration forum on the Hog and this Samuel Johnson quote hits the nail perfectly on the head when applied to the management and leading members there.
I have been looking for the cause of the malaise one feels when visiting the For Your Consideration forum on the Hog and this Samuel Johnson quote hits the nail perfectly on the head when applied to the management and leading members there.
Jul 31, 2017 06:42:55 #
Aw, c'mon now Billy.....
Don't be one whose motto is," I can't wait to hear what I'm going to say next."
Don't be one whose motto is," I can't wait to hear what I'm going to say next."
Jul 31, 2017 06:45:38 #
Jul 31, 2017 06:55:09 #
brobill wrote:
Aw, c'mon now Billy.....
Don't be one whose motto is," I can't wait to hear what I'm going to say next."
Don't be one whose motto is," I can't wait to hear what I'm going to say next."
Actually I do not hang on my every word but others like you my dear boy seem too!
Jul 31, 2017 07:03:22 #
Jul 31, 2017 07:17:14 #
Jul 31, 2017 07:24:44 #
Jul 31, 2017 09:33:23 #
Bunko.T wrote:
Most of the insults here have little or no intelli... (show quote)
Hi Bunko, that's my kind of stuff. I have all those sayings/quotes in my "fun quotes" file and often use them. One of my favs from Mark Twain is "If you don't read newspapers you are uninformed - if you do read newspapers you are misinformed" Particularly true today do you think? Well Donald seems to LoL.
Jul 31, 2017 09:43:08 #
Jul 31, 2017 09:51:55 #
infocus wrote:
Hi Bunko, that's my kind of stuff. I have all those sayings/quotes in my "fun quotes" file and often use them. One of my favs from Mark Twain is "If you don't read newspapers you are uninformed - if you do read newspapers you are misinformed" Particularly true today do you think? Well Donald seems to LoL.
Are you east or west?
There's some clever folks out there. Another Keating quote I loved was: " He's all tip & no iceberg" not sure to whom he was referring, maybe Johnny Howard.
He had nice ways of putting some one down.
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