Old Timer Loc: Greenfield, In.

The are probably wanting it done for free or a reduced price. I have noticed that when shooting relatives it usually hard to get the cooperation from them but some one else they will do what is asked. If you are going to do it do not expect to get paid and if you do it will be at at greatly reduced rate.

rgrenaderphoto Loc: Hollywood, CA

I did this for my Nephew's engagement party. Covered everything, got some really excellent shots. I notices about a week later, that all the other photographers at the event failed to capture a single image of me.

jcboy3

What you might do is help her find a good wedding photographer. Check the portfolio, check the referrals, check the checklist, get a good feeling about the photographer . Since she asked you to do it, it is likely that cost is an issue. Beware of the "Craigslist wedding photographers"; anyone with a camera can advertise as a wedding photographer.

joer Loc: Colorado/Illinois

How good are you? Can you confidently handle it.

It would be a great wedding present if you can pull it off. It takes skill but its not rocket science, but it is hard work.

If you don't have the confidence then avoid it.

Dan821 Loc: Traveling........

Having been the assistant photographer and videographer for several weddings, I would submit that the Sister is after a "free service" from a relative....you!
I would suggest that you NOT even consider it, unless you have shot many weddings professionally. Your response to her request was correct, and you should not feel guilty about refusing to do the shoot.
If she persists, tell her that you would rather enjoy the festivities and not have the burden of trying to capture such a wonderful moment!
Or....tell her that you charge $1000 an hour plus expenses!
That might help! :)

DirtFarmer Loc: Escaped from the NYC area, back to MA

It depends on the size of the wedding. I have shot many weddings, but not as the primary photographer. They have varied in size and formality. My sister's wedding was at home with a JP and a few friends and relatives. I'd guess the largest one had about 150 guests.

A small wedding will not be a big deal. All the guests will bring cameras, after all. You will be one of many. A formal wedding really requires a formal photographer. The management of the shots is not something casual.

If the wedding is on the formal side and if you want to enjoy the wedding, don't take the job. You will be running the whole time. Pros come with assistants to do half the work.

OddJobber Loc: Portland, OR

Thanks to everyone for the reminders for NOT doing this. I have never shot a wedding; I don't want to shoot a wedding; I don't know how to shoot a wedding.

By coincidence, I was approached three days ago to shoot for a friend of a friend who "can't afford much". Having seen this subject surface here more than occasionally, it took less than 30 seconds to recite all the UHH reasons for NOT taking this on. :)

jim quist Loc: Missouri

I read your other posts. I would do the studio bridal shots ahead of time and get some good candids at the wedding and then give her a nice album. At the wedding I would rather have fun. If money isn't an issue for the couple I would pass on it.

DJ Craig Loc: Payson, AZ (North-Central)

Ask your sister if she's doing the catering and the DJing. That should end the issue.

dickwilber Loc: Indiana (currently)

Here's another option - at least if you can deal with shooting candids. Bring in a Pro to do the formals, the ceremony and the posed shots of bride, groom and families, then he leaves. You handle the reception, people dancing and enjoying themselves. The only must get shots are the first dance, the bride & father dance, then the groom and his mother; later the garter ceremony and throwing the bouquet. Until the bouquet is caught, you are on your good behavior - NO BOOZE! Then make up for lost time!

Bobbee

Well, right of the bat you are saying you don't want to do it. Weddings are a lot of work and do require experience and a lot of dedication. Listen to your inner voice. Sounds like your heart is not in it.

Also, this is mom right? What are the Brides thoughts? My daughter is getting married and there is no end to the conversation about what she wants.

rmalarz Loc: Tempe, Arizona

Quite honestly, I think you did the correct thing. In the long run, you'll save yourself a lot of aggravation and save family relationships.
--Bob

pdsdville Loc: Midlothian, Tx

Could be the end of a friendship with your sister. I've shot one wedding (film) and one digital plus backup on my son's wedding in Scotland and I will not, repeat, not do another one. Stress is unbelievable, expectation is unbelievable, and the chances of getting exactly what the bride wants are unbelievably low.....Run the other direction. Better for them to be mad at you for not taking the photos than loosing a, hopefully once in a lifetime event record.

Martys Loc: Lubec, Maine

Not So Obvious,.....Wedding Day Solutions

I wanted to post something a little different about photographing weddings. Although I'm long retired from photographing weddings
(30 +/- years for studios and myself)
I wanted to post a few personal services I always provided at weddings which I hope some may find interesting.
It's a long read,....but an interesting approach I used that proved very rewarding.

First thing, early on at every wedding was to help out everyone involved at the house and put them at ease.
Small things like checking ALL the unopened flowers the flourist just delivered,...remove ALL water globules from the
flower stems and pat them DRY before giving them to the brides maids and bride,...thus avoiding immediate
water stains on their dresses and panic results.

I always carried certain essentials with me that many times saved the day.
Example,...sewing kit with a needle already threaded with white thread,.......lots of safety pins
(yes, safety pins,...they save more disasters than you know),....also,...elastic bands,.....extra boutineer pins,.....mints,...
spare AA batteries,...(not for me,..but..for family members if thier cameras died),...small price for good PR),....
White chalk,..yes,....chalk will quickly cover a scraped white shoe or bridal dress skuff mark),.....a hair brush, comb and
small hand mirror,.....saves the brides day when doing indoor or outdoor portraits,.....spare shoe laces,.....
Bobby Pins is a real biggy,...when a bride can't find her bobby pins,..a photographer has big problems,..and....make sure
you have black, brown and white ones) A spare hankerchief for sobbing mothers, brides or even dads,.
Ive seen that many times.
Are these things normally thought of items a photographer carries to a wedding NO,.....but take it from me,..
At the end of the day,....I was remembered and appreciated for solving some rather trivial disasters.
Just because I thought ahead and carried these items that easily fit into your camera bag or pocket.

The entire cooperation of a wedding party or family can hinge on being helpful at anytime during the wedding day,
These small trivial items if not available at the critical times and places,.....can result in upset brides, brides maids,
ushers, family members,...NOT TO MENTION the entire time frame of tightly scheduled events during the wedding day.
These small items have NOTHING to do with photography,....
but they sure have a lot to do with any unexpected happenings during the day,...ESPECIALLY
everything prior to the ceremony....and the cost is minute and immaterial,..but the recognition from people involved
who are anticipating everything, who are nervious and tense is immesurable.
Yes, the photographer deals with much more than this,....But I just wanted to mention these suggestions, ones that
are never even thought of or considered by photographers.

During weddings,....Always watch where the day gets bottlenecked,....where a family or bride needs something,...
no matter how trivial it seems. Pay attention and carry these small items with you,... and before you know it,...
you'll be circumventing many little neusances that would otherwise create and become BIG wedding day problems.
The BIG and I mean BIG reward are...a group of people who will bend over backwards to work with you all day....
and lots of happy faces,....and great bridal expressions in all your photographs.
Think about it.

Martys

sal gorge

Don't do it!!! It is a very SERIOUS matter and if your photos don't meet family expectations you will never live it down. You can take some candid photos and have fun with them but leave the serious work to the pros.
Sal Gorge