OddJobber Loc: Portland, OR

You know the 7, don't you, that you can't say on Ugly Hedgehog? "Pop, Bokeh, FaceBook, Pix, Capture, Semi-Professsional, and Boudoir".

Those are the heavy seven. Those are the ones that'll infect your soul, curve your spine, and keep the country from winning the war.

Wow! ...and boudoir doesn't even belong on the list. That is such a friendly sounding word.

But every community has it's standards and Ugly Hedgehog, being our community, needs to recognize and stand up for those words that are not accepted as acceptable here.

1. Pop. As in "I want my photos to POP!" That usually translates to overdone HDR or really poorly done filter effects to try to save a really pedestrial snapshot. If you want POP, stick a quarter stick of dynamite under your.... oh, never mind.

2. Bokeh. Which, my reasoning tells me should be properly known as bokeh aji, but is still one of the most hated word here. It literally means the quality of the out of focus areas of your image, but is too often meant as, I couldn't get it in focus, but isn't the background pretty.

3. FaceBook. No self-respecting Hogger would ever admit to having a FaceBook page, home of the glorified snapshot or pix.

4. Pix. The most insulting thing you can call a serious photographers images. Pix = Snapshot. See "FaceBook", above.

5. Capture. Should mean the same as picture, image or photo, but is used by the "artistically inclined" to mean "I captured the essence of this scene. You're just too stupid to see it."

6. Semi-Professional. Technically still out for debate. Definitions range from, "You sold one photo for $5 so now you need to register with your local, county and state governments, have liability insurance and get an IRS identification number", to, "If you don't make 2/3 of your income from photography, it's still a hobby".

7. Boudoir. Ah, yes, the one that probably doesn't belong on this list. But just mention it and the die-hard Christians will come out of the woodwork telling you that you're going to Hell for looking at t*ts. But that's one of Georges's 7 words you can't say, so I'll leave it at that. Have fun!

St3v3M Loc: 35,000 feet

Thank you

rocco_7155 Loc: Connecticut/Louisiana

HI - frickin' - LARIOUS. With all due respect to George Carlin! :thumbup:

Terra Australis Loc: Australia

Well, I captured a Pix of my squeeze in her Boudoir with my Semi Professional Instamatic and was so impressed by the way the image Popped out and by the sublime Bokeh that I am going to put it on Facebook.


I am probably going to hell too.

Oliver.

rocco_7155 Loc: Connecticut/Louisiana

...and the secretary will disavow any knowledge of your existence. LOL

crimesc324 Loc: West Palm Beach, Florida

Excellent, thank you

firtree Loc: Florida, USA

That is so funny.... wanna borrow my pitchfork? (Or would that be 'pixfork'?)

sb Loc: Florida's East Coast

Uh...so it's not just me that has had these thoughts?

ocbeyer Loc: Baltimore

LMAO

juicesqueezer Loc: Okeechobee, Florida

Now, that's funny! Always knew the Aussie's had a sense of humor!

Granddad Loc: UK

Very good OddJobber.
Dave.

DaveO Loc: Northeast CT

Brings a smile! Thank-you.

Pierre H.J. Dumais Loc: Mississippi Mills, Ont.

You got it!!!!

Pierre

twindad Loc: SW Michigan, frolicking in the snow.

Great sense of humor! May I add to the list?
A. Wedding, as in, "Shooting a friend's wedding". Always worth at least 4 pages of "advice".
B. "All around zoom lens". Also worth 4 pages, including advice to, "Just get a god-damn prime lens and shoot film like I did forty years ago!"

Nic42 Loc: Cardiff, Wales

Unless they lose the cricket

:twisted: