(Bad) jokes for phyisics majors
Aug 9, 2020 12:32:37 #
Dannj wrote:
I heard a few pages of these were found among Galileo’s notes😳
And in those days, all the happy Phizzy stuff was written in Latin. Not a great language for puns unless the puns mainly avoid nouns and verbs. So Galileo must have been particularly gifted. Ubi, Ubi Sub Ubi Est?
Aug 9, 2020 12:56:18 #
CWGordon wrote:
They may be old, but are new to those of us who are not Physics folks. The humor quality may be a problem, though.
Yes, real Physics is only vaguely familiar to the rest of the world.
Aug 9, 2020 12:59:50 #
jerryc41 wrote:
Reminds me of The Big Bang Theory. 
I missed the "Big Bang" so much that I bought the whole series on DVD.
I also loved "Last Man Standing" with Tim Allen. It's being repeated on Cable now.
Aug 9, 2020 13:27:08 #
editorsteve wrote:
And in those days, all the happy Phizzy stuff was written in Latin. Not a great language for puns unless the puns mainly avoid nouns and verbs. So Galileo must have been particularly gifted. Ubi, Ubi Sub Ubi Est?
Semper ubi sub ubi?
Aug 9, 2020 13:50:14 #
editorsteve wrote:
Ashes of stars.Most of the atoms in our body were manufactured inside stars. Think about it. We are mostly star stuff.
Aug 9, 2020 13:53:23 #
Dannj wrote:
Always wear underwear.Semper ubi sub ubi?
Si Vile, si ergo.
Fortibus is in ero.
O Nobile, dem is trux.
Vatis enim, causan dux.
Aug 9, 2020 14:24:47 #
Aug 9, 2020 14:33:22 #
Aug 9, 2020 14:36:52 #
Aug 9, 2020 15:47:56 #
You all inverted my valency and made me go dig this out of my 1960s folder.
--------------------
The Sex life of an Electron by Eddie Currents
One night when his charge was pretty high, Micro-Farad decided to seek out a cute little coil to help him discharge.
He picked up Milli-Amp and took her for a ride on his Megacycle. They rode across the Wheatstone Bridge.
They stopped by a Magnetic field with flowing currents and frolicked in the sine waves.
Micro-Farad, attracted by Millie-Amp's characteristic curves soon had her fully charged.
He proceeded to excite her resistance to a minimum.
He gently laid her at ground potential, raised her frequency and lowered her reluctance.
With a quick arc, he pulled out his high voltage probe and inserted it in her socket, connecting them in parallel.
He slowly began short circuiting her resistance shunt while quickly raising her thermal conductance level to Mil-Spec.
Fully excited, Milli- Amp mumbled, "OHM...OHM...OHM"
With his tube operating well into class C, her field was vibrating with his current flow.
A corona formed which instantly caused her shunt to overheat.
Just at that point, Micro-Farad rapidly discharged and drained off every electron into her grid.
They fluxed all night trying various connectors and sockets until his magnet had a soft core and lost all of its field strength.
Afterwards, Milli-Amp tried self-induction and damaged her solenoids.
With his battery fully discharged, Micro-Farad was unable to excite his field.
Not ready to be quiescent, they spent the rest of the evening reversing polarity and blowing each other’s fuses.
--------------------
The Sex life of an Electron by Eddie Currents
One night when his charge was pretty high, Micro-Farad decided to seek out a cute little coil to help him discharge.
He picked up Milli-Amp and took her for a ride on his Megacycle. They rode across the Wheatstone Bridge.
They stopped by a Magnetic field with flowing currents and frolicked in the sine waves.
Micro-Farad, attracted by Millie-Amp's characteristic curves soon had her fully charged.
He proceeded to excite her resistance to a minimum.
He gently laid her at ground potential, raised her frequency and lowered her reluctance.
With a quick arc, he pulled out his high voltage probe and inserted it in her socket, connecting them in parallel.
He slowly began short circuiting her resistance shunt while quickly raising her thermal conductance level to Mil-Spec.
Fully excited, Milli- Amp mumbled, "OHM...OHM...OHM"
With his tube operating well into class C, her field was vibrating with his current flow.
A corona formed which instantly caused her shunt to overheat.
Just at that point, Micro-Farad rapidly discharged and drained off every electron into her grid.
They fluxed all night trying various connectors and sockets until his magnet had a soft core and lost all of its field strength.
Afterwards, Milli-Amp tried self-induction and damaged her solenoids.
With his battery fully discharged, Micro-Farad was unable to excite his field.
Not ready to be quiescent, they spent the rest of the evening reversing polarity and blowing each other’s fuses.
Aug 9, 2020 15:51:47 #
David in Dallas wrote:
Always wear underwear.
Si Vile, si ergo.
Fortibus is in ero.
O Nobile, dem is trux.
Vatis enim, causan dux.
Si Vile, si ergo.
Fortibus is in ero.
O Nobile, dem is trux.
Vatis enim, causan dux.
Oh see, Willie, see her go
Forty busses in a row
Oh no Billie, them is truc
What is in ‘em, cows and ducks.
Aug 9, 2020 16:05:05 #
Aug 9, 2020 17:45:09 #
fourlocks wrote:
I saw a couple of "...walks into a bar" ... (show quote)
Physics jokes for dummies. I liked them.
Aug 9, 2020 19:03:28 #
Aug 9, 2020 19:52:18 #
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