A little Humor
Jul 18, 2023 20:31:50 #
Today I was in a shoe store that sells only shoes, nothing else. A young girl with a tattoo and green hair walked over to me andI asked, "What brings you in today, I looked at her and said, "I'm interested in buying a refrigerator." She didn't quite know how to respond, had that deer in the headlights look.
I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.
When people see a cat's litter box they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat" I just say, "No, it's for company!"
Employment application blanks always ask who is to be called in case of an emergency. I think you should write, "An ambulance."
The older you get the tougher it is to lose weight because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
Have you ever noticed: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL.
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he knows when he's really in trouble.
Did you ever notice that when you put the 2 words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "Theirs"
Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
Some people try to turn back their "odometers." Not me.
I want people to know why I look this way.
I've traveled a long way and a lot of the roads were not paved.
Ah! Being young is beautiful but being old is comfortable.
Lord, keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth.
May you always have:
Love to share,
Cash to spare,
Tires with air,
And friends who care.
I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.
When people see a cat's litter box they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat" I just say, "No, it's for company!"
Employment application blanks always ask who is to be called in case of an emergency. I think you should write, "An ambulance."
The older you get the tougher it is to lose weight because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
Have you ever noticed: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL.
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he knows when he's really in trouble.
Did you ever notice that when you put the 2 words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "Theirs"
Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
Some people try to turn back their "odometers." Not me.
I want people to know why I look this way.
I've traveled a long way and a lot of the roads were not paved.
Ah! Being young is beautiful but being old is comfortable.
Lord, keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth.
May you always have:
Love to share,
Cash to spare,
Tires with air,
And friends who care.
Jul 18, 2023 22:14:38 #
Jul 18, 2023 23:24:25 #
Jul 19, 2023 00:48:26 #
Jul 19, 2023 04:54:14 #
Jul 19, 2023 05:17:42 #
Jul 19, 2023 06:19:12 #
Jul 19, 2023 07:15:03 #
lbrande wrote:
Today I was in a shoe store that sells only shoes, nothing else……..
All of them are quite good. Some are absolutely hysterical.
Jul 19, 2023 08:04:21 #
Jul 19, 2023 08:08:56 #
Jul 19, 2023 08:20:38 #
Jul 19, 2023 08:51:23 #
Jul 19, 2023 10:02:39 #
RiJoRi
Loc: Sandy Ridge, NC
The shoe store and the cat litter ones fit my sense of humor to a T. 🤣
Another one I like is, "They call it 'middle age' because that's where it shows first!"
--Rich
Another one I like is, "They call it 'middle age' because that's where it shows first!"
--Rich
Jul 19, 2023 10:34:47 #
Jul 19, 2023 11:16:04 #
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