Meaning of Marriage
Nov 9, 2012 10:53:03 #
1. Marriage is not a word, it's a sentence (a life sentence).
2. Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore marriage is an institution for the blind.
3. Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her Masters.
4. Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring and suffering.
5. Married life is full of excitement and frustration: In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the NEIGHBOR listens.
6. Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, and when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that instead.
7. There was this man who muttered a few words in the church and found himself married. A year later he muttered something in his sleep and found himself divorced.
8. A happy marriage is a matter of giving and taking; the husband gives and the wife takes.
9. Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad? Father: I don't know son, I'm still paying for it.
10. Son: Is it true Dad? I heard that in ancient China, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her. Father: That's true everywhere, son, EVERYWHERE!
11. Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.
12. They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage it is self-defense.
13. When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a 10-year married man looks happy, we wonder why.
14. There was this lover who said that he would go through hell for her. They got married, and now he is going through HELL.
15. Confucius says: man who sinks into woman's arm soon have arms in woman's sink.
16. When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
17. Eighty percent of married man cheat in America, the rest cheat in Europe.
18. After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin. They can't face each other, but still they stay together.
19. Marriage is man and a woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
20. Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After the marriage the "Y" becomes silent.
21. "I married Miss right, I just didn't know her first name was Always."
22. It's not true that married men live longer than single men, it only seems longer.
23. Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.
24. A man was complaining to a friend: "I HAD IT ALL - MONEY, A BEAUTIFUL HOUSE, THE LOVE OF A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN, THEN POW! IT WAS ALL GONE."Â "WHAT HAPPENED?" asked his friend. He says "MY WIFE FOUND OUT."
25. WIFE: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. HUSBAND: OK, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway lights on.
26. At a cocktail party, one woman said to another: "AREN'T YOU WEARING YOUR RING ON THE WRONG FINGER?" The other replied, "YES, I, AM. I MARRIED THE WRONG MAN."
27. Man is incomplete until he gets married, then he is finished.
28. It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.
29. A man inserted an ad in the paper - WIFE WANTED. The next day he received a hundred letters and they all said the same thing - YOU CAN HAVE MINE.
30. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing - either the car is new or the wife is.
Sarge69 :thumbup: :mrgreen: :thumbup:
2. Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore marriage is an institution for the blind.
3. Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her Masters.
4. Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring and suffering.
5. Married life is full of excitement and frustration: In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the NEIGHBOR listens.
6. Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, and when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that instead.
7. There was this man who muttered a few words in the church and found himself married. A year later he muttered something in his sleep and found himself divorced.
8. A happy marriage is a matter of giving and taking; the husband gives and the wife takes.
9. Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad? Father: I don't know son, I'm still paying for it.
10. Son: Is it true Dad? I heard that in ancient China, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her. Father: That's true everywhere, son, EVERYWHERE!
11. Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.
12. They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage it is self-defense.
13. When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a 10-year married man looks happy, we wonder why.
14. There was this lover who said that he would go through hell for her. They got married, and now he is going through HELL.
15. Confucius says: man who sinks into woman's arm soon have arms in woman's sink.
16. When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
17. Eighty percent of married man cheat in America, the rest cheat in Europe.
18. After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin. They can't face each other, but still they stay together.
19. Marriage is man and a woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
20. Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After the marriage the "Y" becomes silent.
21. "I married Miss right, I just didn't know her first name was Always."
22. It's not true that married men live longer than single men, it only seems longer.
23. Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.
24. A man was complaining to a friend: "I HAD IT ALL - MONEY, A BEAUTIFUL HOUSE, THE LOVE OF A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN, THEN POW! IT WAS ALL GONE."Â "WHAT HAPPENED?" asked his friend. He says "MY WIFE FOUND OUT."
25. WIFE: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. HUSBAND: OK, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway lights on.
26. At a cocktail party, one woman said to another: "AREN'T YOU WEARING YOUR RING ON THE WRONG FINGER?" The other replied, "YES, I, AM. I MARRIED THE WRONG MAN."
27. Man is incomplete until he gets married, then he is finished.
28. It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.
29. A man inserted an ad in the paper - WIFE WANTED. The next day he received a hundred letters and they all said the same thing - YOU CAN HAVE MINE.
30. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing - either the car is new or the wife is.
Sarge69 :thumbup: :mrgreen: :thumbup:
Nov 9, 2012 13:45:17 #
Nov 9, 2012 14:17:24 #
treehugger
Loc: Eastern Idaho Highlands
I didn't like any of them! I have been married to the same women for 50yrs, and none of the examples ring true to my experience.
Nov 10, 2012 09:31:41 #
I sure feel sorry for anyone that identifies with any of them. I have been married 52 years and feel like it's just a good start. I am a Mormon and we believe in eternal marriage. Dave
Nov 10, 2012 09:52:39 #
Nov 10, 2012 12:12:21 #
Nov 10, 2012 13:54:52 #
Nov 10, 2012 16:46:50 #
Pentony
Loc: Earth Traveller
These seemed to refer mainly, mainly to American born and raised women. :evil: :evil:
Foreign born and raised women are not that way until they become Americanized. :lol: :lol: :lol:
Foreign born and raised women are not that way until they become Americanized. :lol: :lol: :lol:
Nov 10, 2012 16:52:08 #
Nov 10, 2012 23:12:04 #
treehugger wrote:
I didn't like any of them! I have been married to the same women for 50yrs, and none of the examples ring true to my experience.
ah lets see: that would be a number 13 I think!
Nov 10, 2012 23:28:49 #
Pentony wrote:
These seemed to refer mainly, mainly to American born and raised women. :evil: :evil:
Foreign born and raised women are not that way until they become Americanized. :lol: :lol: :lol:
Foreign born and raised women are not that way until they become Americanized. :lol: :lol: :lol:
Many of us on uhh it seems were stationed in Europe in the 60's. Those of us who at that time weren't married, had discussions with European girls about life there and back in the "world". One glareing fact always came up that I wonder about at times even today. European women viewed American women as spoiled brats. Since they had to, at that time, shop daily for food for dinner and breakfast, they thought that our women had it to easy with large oversized refrigerators filled from large oversized supermarkets.
Dishwashers, in house washer/dryer, central heat and a/c and of course our oversized "yank tanks"(cars). I haven't been back yet. Have some of our conveniences crossed the pond?
I imagine much has, as we finaly have T.V. that has a picture that rivals what they had all along.
Nov 10, 2012 23:57:26 #
Nov 11, 2012 00:09:24 #
Sweet Willie
Loc: Texas
I have been happily married for 32 years.............................The other 18 years
weren't so hot. :I
Sweet Willie
weren't so hot. :I
Sweet Willie
Nov 11, 2012 00:44:34 #
Michael O'
Loc: Midwest right now
treehugger wrote:
I didn't like any of them! I have been married to the same women for 50yrs, and none of the examples ring true to my experience.
Well, you hug trees , too.
Nov 11, 2012 07:05:18 #
enjoyed all the posts! i like to laugh in the mornings. this is my forty first year and i enjoy my marriage more each day. when i first married, i put my wife thru hell. i am trying to make up for those years. one of the posts struck home. it was about understanding a woman. simply put, that is impossible. women can not be understood. i have a lane that comes from the road to my house. it is official. has its own illuminated street sign. the name of our lane, "HER WAY." says it all.
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