samantha90 Loc: Fort Worth,Texas

My granny sent me the following. I'm sure most members here have heard most of these from their mom I've heard a number of them.

Why I Owe My Mother
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1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE . "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION . "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL . "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC . "Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC . "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT . "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY . "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS . "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTION-ISM . "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA ... "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone." 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER . "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY . "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE . "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION . "Stop acting like your father!" 15. My mother taught me about ENVY . "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do." 16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION . "Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING .. "You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE . "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP . "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR . "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT . "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS . "You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS . "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM . "When you get to be my age, you'll understand." And my favorite:
25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE . "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

But, there is one missing from this list~~My personal all time favorite!! My mother taught me about CHOICE . "Do you want me to stop this car?"

DavidPhares Loc: Chandler, Arizona

I really enjoy your posts! 😃

Longshadow Loc: Audubon, PA, United States

SteveR Loc: Michigan

While kids and on vacation from Michigan in South Dakota, it had been a long journey for my sister and I together in the back seat. We were constantly at one another. At a stop somewhere Dad came across a short, flat, wide, riding crop which he hung on the rear view mirror. Several times we were asked, "do you want me to stop?" It never was meant to be used. It had it's own magic without ever being used.

pendennis

Both my late mom and dad used the "Why I Owe..." list. And I smile every time I see it. My parents were the issue of the Great Depression, and a lot of their wisdom came from that experience.

I did win out on Number 10, although a different vegetable. I detested peas, and still do. I just couldn't get them down without gagging. One evening my mom served them, and I just let them sit on the plate. In a battle of wills, she told me I would sit in the chair until I ate the peas. I sat there until I went to sleep, although I didn't do a face plant into the plate; but in the end I never had to eat peas again.

And with discipline it was never "Wait until your father gets home". Justice was dispensed immediately, and without mercy. I cut my own switch a number of times. And when dad got home, I usually got a dose of correction from him also.

SteveR Loc: Michigan

Canned peas were awful!!

NMGal Loc: NE NM

I heard several of these from my mother. Great post.

RiJoRi Loc: Sandy Ridge, NC

Y'all probably would have loved my granny who lived with us. When she cooked canned veggies – even corn 🙄 – she would add sugar to them. (I think she taught Mary Poppins – "A spoonful of sugar helps the veggies go down"!)

--Rich

tramsey Loc: Texas

I remember many of these. Especially, Do you want me stop? We found things to do real quick

UTMike Loc: South Jordan, UT

LOL! Keep them coming.

SnoShuSam Loc: Texas, (ex Virginian)

My mother used the last one once for real on Connecticut Ave. in Wash. DC. My cousin and I were in the back seat playing and had been given "the warning" several times which we laughed at. Then at Ordway St. NW she pulled the car over, got out and came into the backseat to give it to us across our bottoms. We settled down till we got home and then my cousin made the big mistake of complaining about the incident to her mother as a way to get her mom to even the score. Big Mistake for Charlotte! She got another two whacks from her mother for her behavior. Lesson forever remembered!

yssirk123 Loc: New Jersey

jaymatt Loc: Alexandria, Indiana

Canisdirus

All of your examples are funny and true!!

First time I went riding with my future mother in law...she was pulled over by a cop on the corner...she ran a stop sign.

She talked so fast and dressed him down in a verbal machine gun that was....withering.
I had never seen such professional 'MOM' speak...it was a force of nature.
Before the cop could even utter anything out that was intelligible (he had a defeated look)...she drove away.

I looked at my wife and gave the big thumbs up. Have to give respect when you see it...

jerryc41 Loc: Catskill Mts of NY

Wow! Mom was busy!