A SENIOR'S TRIP TO COSTCO
Jan 20, 2019 19:13:40 #
A SENIOR'S TRIP TO COSTCO
Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina Dog Chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line when woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had, an elephant? So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit us both. I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack because he was laughing so hard.
Costco won't let me shop there anymore.
Better watch what you ask retired people.
They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say...
Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina Dog Chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line when woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had, an elephant? So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit us both. I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack because he was laughing so hard.
Costco won't let me shop there anymore.
Better watch what you ask retired people.
They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say...
Jan 20, 2019 19:56:37 #
Jan 20, 2019 20:00:08 #
Jan 20, 2019 20:25:51 #
NMGal wrote:
Laugh out Loud.
Glad you liked it. Thanks for the response.
Jan 20, 2019 20:26:03 #
Jan 20, 2019 21:16:30 #
This is hilariously funny 😆 i
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Jerry in NC
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Jerry in NC
Jan 21, 2019 07:43:13 #
Jan 21, 2019 08:03:45 #
Jan 21, 2019 08:41:52 #
Jan 21, 2019 08:57:33 #
alby
Loc: very eastern pa.
think i heard that one before... but i a senior so i am not sure... laughed again
Jan 21, 2019 10:06:50 #
Jan 21, 2019 10:11:40 #
Jan 21, 2019 10:56:42 #
Jan 21, 2019 11:40:41 #
Jan 21, 2019 11:47:25 #
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