Ugly Hedgehog - Photography Forum
Home Active Topics Newest Pictures Search Login Register
General Chit-Chat (non-photography talk)
I'm too old for this stuff! (Humor)
Page 1 of 2 next>
Mar 26, 2017 00:51:03   #
GENorkus Loc: Washington Twp, Michigan
 
My part time work is with retailing and you hear some crazy things from customers like I heard today while restocking shelves.

I turned towards an attractive lady about in her mid twenties.


(Start of joke)

Her:
"Sir, I'd like a screw. Four actually." (slight pause from her, then...) "They have to be self drilling."

(End of joke.)


It's a good thing I didn't hint about the humor of what she said. I might have been fired!

Reply
Mar 26, 2017 03:29:32   #
Leicaflex Loc: Cymru
 

Reply
Mar 26, 2017 06:52:59   #
Tom G Loc: Atlanta, GA
 
In this P.C., time, maybe jail.

Reply
 
 
Mar 27, 2017 05:59:01   #
grillmaster5062
 
I spent 15+ years in retail sales, and believe me, there is no end to stupid questions! How do some of these people even remember how to breathe?

Reply
Mar 27, 2017 07:40:10   #
brittainsas1 Loc: Laytonsville, Md.
 
PC or not......I would have said "Far be it from me not to help you ! "
GENorkus wrote:
My part time work is with retailing and you hear some crazy things from customers like I heard today while restocking shelves.

I turned towards an attractive lady about in her mid twenties.


(Start of joke)

Her:
"Sir, I'd like a screw. Four actually." (slight pause from her, then...) "They have to be self drilling."

(End of joke.)


It's a good thing I didn't hint about the humor of what she said. I might have been fired!

Reply
Mar 27, 2017 07:53:11   #
JADAV
 
I was working in a local supermarket when an irritable, impatient customer shouted to me from the far end of the busy aisle where the home medications are : "Do you have any tablets for hayfever; or am I going completely mad?"
I made my way through the crowd who were now watching how things were going to develop to where the customer was standing. I reached out and picked up a packet of the tablets from the shelf right next to him and handed them to him. He was so irritated to have brought everyone's attention to himself that he snapped at me: "So, obviously, I am going completely mad!"
I was shocked to hear myself answer "We definitely don't have tablets for that, sir". I could hear people all around sniggering at my comment so lamely added, " Otherwise I'd already be taking them"

Reply
Mar 27, 2017 08:40:14   #
team 1
 
Stupid questions: Taught American History in high school !!! need I say more ?

Reply
 
 
Mar 27, 2017 11:47:42   #
SteveR Loc: Michigan
 
I asked a group of 3rd graders in Sunday School once a question that was a bit over their heads. I asked, "what is Holiness." The answer I got back was "gravity." Actually....that was a fairly astute answer.

Reply
Mar 27, 2017 11:52:42   #
EdJ0307 Loc: out west someplace
 
She should have said she would like a threaded fastener. Self-tapping. Even then I'd bet someone would have to give it a sexual connotation.

Reply
Mar 27, 2017 14:34:35   #
Kuzano
 
I got a computer support call. This customer wanted me to send someone out to fix the cup-holder on his new computer. I said, "uh what cupholder".

He said, "Oh you know, the tray that pops out when you push a button on the front of the tray, to hold your cup of coffee!"

But that's not nearly as laughable as the lady who brought her new computer in because it would not start up. She brought it in twice. I finally said, "Ok, let me follow you home and see what's happening?" It worked fine both times she brought it in.

I asked her to hook it up and push the button on the front of the computer (desktop). Would not start. I looked over her setup. She had the power cord for the power strip plugged back into the power strip, instead of the wall outlet.

Reply
Mar 27, 2017 15:18:23   #
ysam45
 
I was working for Sears when some younger associates had a "pain" for a customer. I heard the one guy say "here's your sign". After the customer left I asked him about the sign. He told me about a new comedian named Bill Engvall who says stupid people should wear an "I'm Stupid" sign around their neck. The comedian sounded funny so I bought some of his CDs on my way home. I listened to them on my way to work in the morning. HE WAS FUNNY! I parked my car, went into the store....first customer of the day asked "How much does the $88.00 drill cost?" I wanted to say "here's your sign!"

Reply
 
 
Mar 27, 2017 15:46:11   #
Cornishpete Loc: Illinois
 
I was a tool dept manager in our local Sears Hardware.

Lady customer: 'Do you have any yards-sticks'

Me: "Yes ma'am. Let me get you one."

Lady customer: "So as not to waste your time -how long are they?"

Me: "You are lucky ma'am, we have just had a fresh batch in. These new ones are all three feet!"

Lady: "Thank you so much you guys are so helpful, this is why I always shop Sears'

Me: "Thank you ma'am". ( and a thought bubble rose above my head you are a very pretty blond lady but glad I married a brunette!

Reply
Mar 27, 2017 15:50:56   #
Cornishpete Loc: Illinois
 
I was a tool dept manager in our local Sears Hardware.

Lady customer: "Do you have any yards-sticks?"

Me: "Yes ma'am. Let me get you one."

Lady customer: "So as not to waste your time -how long are they?"

Me: "You are lucky ma'am, we have just had a fresh batch in. These new ones are all three feet!"

Lady: "Thank you so much, you guys are so helpful, this is why I always shop Sears"

Me: "Thank you ma'am". ( and a thought bubble rose above my head you are a very pretty blond lady but glad I married a brunette!

Reply
Mar 27, 2017 16:30:59   #
whitewolfowner
 
You should have offered to accommodate her; she may have taken you up and followed through. After all, she did ask!

Reply
Mar 27, 2017 17:02:39   #
Valenta Loc: Top of NZ
 
I work in a liquor store. Checking the age of minors is always a problem. I was checking the ID of one young lady - who, it turned out, was was well over age, when an Australian lady, who was with the first one said: I am old enough - I have stretch marks too - would you like to see them. About a dozen in the shop at the time and they all cracked up....

I had to smile - quietly...

Reply
Page 1 of 2 next>
If you want to reply, then register here. Registration is free and your account is created instantly, so you can post right away.
General Chit-Chat (non-photography talk)
UglyHedgehog.com - Forum
Copyright 2011-2024 Ugly Hedgehog, Inc.