lost motivation/momentum/stuck in a rut
May 20, 2012 13:44:48 #
I'm sitting in a hotel room in West Monroe, La.-stalled. There are things out there I haven't seen so why haven't I felt the need to grab up the camera and go? I didn't feel that way while down in Fla. and while the area around here is not as appealing to me as it was down there, there is still so much outside my door waiting to be seen. My mind is constantly turning with so much I have coming up to be done. Leaving here on Wed. morning to go home, wash, repack to go with a cousin to New Orleans, a place she has never been, where we will be at a steady trot for two days. Back home on Sun. then up on Mon. to meet up with 2 of my grandchildren's other grandmother to pick them up. Planning a pirate birthday party for my granddaughter for the 9th. Sometime during all this getting a bridesmaids dress re-sized for my daughter but I will be getting someone else to do that, and getting the flower girl dress made for my granddaughter which at this point I'm planning on doing myself. Then getting the 2 grandkids back up to their mother for the wkend of the 15,16,17 during which time I will be meeting up with the bride to be to do her bridal photos in Tuscaloosa. Cutting it close but her dress has just now come in(I hope) and needing some alteration but it is something I am looking forward to and worrying about all at the same time. Then will get the grandkids back on the 17th and either come home that night or get up the next morning and come home. That next wkend is the wedding of our nephew which is the one the bridesmaids dress and flower girl's dress have to be complete for. Have I taken a breath yet? I'm not sure I will have time for that. Maybe after the wedding I can. And on top of all of this my heart is heavy with sadness. I had an English Bulldog for 9yrs. When my husbands job looked like it was going to be sending him to various places and that I could go with him I decided to give him to a cousin of mine, a younger woman and her husband. They took him in and he has been their baby, coddled and spoiled more than I ever did him. We learned this week he has bone cancer. I am currently 6hrs away and want to see him. Yes I could have already left to go home but I have a husband here who will be remaining here until some time close to June 20. She has called me daily about him and we have been putting our nurse brains together on his condition. The vet has said it is bad and he basically wants to keep him comfortable until I can get home. Knowing it was only going to be a matter of days he was ok with that but said if it were going to be 2-3 wks. he would need to do different. They have him on morphine liquid and I learned last night he is not liking it. So far though she has gotten him to take it.
So I guess it is no wonder I've lost my spark to get out there with my camera. :cry:
So I guess it is no wonder I've lost my spark to get out there with my camera. :cry:
May 21, 2012 03:09:19 #
My goodness, Deanna, I don't know how you do it! You're thinking about all the things you need to do for a whole month! Me, I can barely even think of the things I need to do today! Not that I am doing so many things...no way. But 1 day in advance is all I can occupy my mind with. It works for me, because that way I seem to find time to get on UHH, or work on a photo, or go play pool with friends. If I had to think about a whole month, I think I would just "crash and burn"!
I wish you the best with your puppy-dog; that's so hard to deal with, especially when you can't be there.
I wish you the best with your puppy-dog; that's so hard to deal with, especially when you can't be there.
May 21, 2012 04:34:34 #
oldmalky
Loc: West Midlands,England.
I have read this several times to try and post a reply which you would find helpful but i am unable to, a bit like Danillo really i try not to get to far in front of myself, I really hope you are able to find the solution that makes it easier for you to manage,my thoughts are with you
oldmalky
oldmalky
May 21, 2012 07:38:56 #
Oh, poor Deanna. Life has a way of making us crazy sometimes.
There is really nothing I can think of to say to make you feel better.
I will keep you in my prayers.
I have a feeling, that if you make the trip home to see the pup, and that is taken care of, sad though it is, your burden will lighten a bit. The poor baby suffering I'm sure is making your heart heavy.
I hope everything works out for you. And,...smoothly.
Once all of these burdens go away, you will get back your spark back to start snapping photos.
Take care Hon.
There is really nothing I can think of to say to make you feel better.
I will keep you in my prayers.
I have a feeling, that if you make the trip home to see the pup, and that is taken care of, sad though it is, your burden will lighten a bit. The poor baby suffering I'm sure is making your heart heavy.
I hope everything works out for you. And,...smoothly.
Once all of these burdens go away, you will get back your spark back to start snapping photos.
Take care Hon.
May 21, 2012 10:13:47 #
I do so appreciate each one of you for your input. I'm a talker and at this time this is my only means of expressing myself. I'm here due to my husbands work which takes him off at 4:30am and not back until sometimes 8-8:30 at night. Spending a lot of time by myself with my own thoughts. My pup died Sun. but he was not alone but with the adoptive father. And so life goes on.
May 21, 2012 12:29:20 #
Sounds like time for some prayers. Talk to Him; heard He isn't too busy to listen.
P.S. Enjoy your posts! You make many people smile.
P.S. Enjoy your posts! You make many people smile.
May 21, 2012 13:23:05 #
Hello Deanna, instead of thinking of all the things you have on the to do list, try making a list for each day of what you can accomplish that day. It is important that you include time for you each day to do things that interest you. It is also good to have time for spiritual enrichment each day (i.e. reading, praying, meditation, etc.).
May 21, 2012 17:08:39 #
deanna_hg wrote:
I'm sitting in a hotel room in West Monroe, La.-st... (show quote)
Deanna, I hesitate to say this but I must, please see a doctor, you may be suffering from depression. From what you say in your post, it points to that. It makes you lose interest in things you like, anhedonia.
May 21, 2012 17:39:18 #
deanna_hg wrote:
I'm sitting in a hotel room in West Monroe, La.-st... (show quote)
No wonder I am so tired !!!!!!! I don't see how you do it girl.
May 21, 2012 18:00:22 #
with all that going on plus the bad news about the pooch, its no wonder you don't feel like shooting photographs. take what is going on in your life like it was learning elements. small bites, understand levels before dealing with layers if you know what i mean. Prayer is always the best solution. also remember "stressed is just desserts spelled backwards! a problem and solution all in one. have some personal time for yourself. i do not know if you are depressed or not, only you can tell if something is not right. I am diagnosed with severe chronic depression, with social anxiety disorders and asperger traits. what works for me is photography. when i got my d100 in my hands, i feel normal. or if i go through my past photos it encourages me to realize i am better than i give myself credit for. In fact i teach a therapy group called photographic expression therapy which uses photography as a way of expressing one's feelings. i had a 2 year stint where i did not touch my camera because i felt my muse was gone. by forcing myself i was able to overcome the block
one other thing you can try is instead of going out looking for a specific subject, go out looking for a themelike the color red, or texture, or joy. I found by doing that and reading and applying bryan petersens book "learning to see creatively" i have never since had a case of photoblock. god luck relax don't sweat the small stuff, if it isn't about life, death or where you will spend eternity, its all small stuff.
one other thing you can try is instead of going out looking for a specific subject, go out looking for a themelike the color red, or texture, or joy. I found by doing that and reading and applying bryan petersens book "learning to see creatively" i have never since had a case of photoblock. god luck relax don't sweat the small stuff, if it isn't about life, death or where you will spend eternity, its all small stuff.
May 21, 2012 20:56:44 #
My appreciation to each of you for your encouragement. Was feeling overwhelmed and my computer became my sounding board. I do plan on getting some help with the dresses which I had planned on doing for the alteration anyway. Getting back home I'm sure will help too. And as the saying goes 'time heals all wounds'. Just wasn't expecting what happened to my Boggs(the pup) to have happened since I had taken him to the vet before transferring him to his new home. I have my yorkie who has stayed right by me and who does not realize she is a dog. I'll plan on a new adventure with my camera when I go to New Orleans this weekend.
May 21, 2012 21:37:29 #
deanna_hg wrote:
My appreciation to each of you for your encouragem... (show quote)
Blessings be on you and keep the Hoggies up to date darlin'.
May 21, 2012 22:25:08 #
May 22, 2012 17:44:26 #
May 23, 2012 11:06:15 #
Oh,...so sorry about Boggs.
New Orleans this week end?? Sounds like fun!
Make sure you bring your camera, walk around, take photos of things that you would never even think of taking photos of before.
You may be surprised.
Enjoy yourself!!!!
:)
New Orleans this week end?? Sounds like fun!
Make sure you bring your camera, walk around, take photos of things that you would never even think of taking photos of before.
You may be surprised.
Enjoy yourself!!!!
:)
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