NeilL Loc: British-born Canadian

Most of our generation 50+ were HOME SCHOOLED in many ways.

1. My mother taught me
TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside.
I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock
You into the middle of next week!"

4. My father taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC ..
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck,
You're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case
You're in an accident."

7. My father taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying,
And I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck."

10.. My mother taught me about STAMINA..
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11.. My mother taught me about WEATHER..
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12.. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times.
Don't exaggerate!"

13.. My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out..."

14. My mother taught me about
BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .
"Stop acting like your father!"

15.. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in
This world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16.. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17.. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it from your father
When he gets home!"

18.. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes,
They are going to get stuck that way."

19.. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know
When you are cold?"

20. My father taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes,
Don't come running to me."

21.. My mother taught me
HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22.. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father.."

23.. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you.
Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24.. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand.

25.. My father taught me about JUSTICE .
"One day you'll have kids,
And I hope they turn out just like you !"

bcheary Loc: Jacksonville, FL

:lol: :lol: Home sweet home. Those were the days Neil.

dljen Loc: Central PA

It seems I've heard all of those comments at one time or another when I was a kid. The one most often used by Mom was, "Wait till your father gets home!" That meant we were in deep shit.

One time, Mom said that to my two brothers and me. He was late coming home. Oh geez. Then we lucked out, he was late for a meeting and didn't have time to discipline us! Dem were the days! :D

silver-rail Loc: harrisburg, pa

it sounds like we had the same parents wish they were still around to give me more such wisdom semper fi

DePratt Loc: Stantonsburg, NC

Been there, Done that.

DePratt

NeilL Loc: British-born Canadian

But we did respect our parents more than the kids do today.

NeilL Loc: British-born Canadian

Yes! Me too. I'd forgotten what I'd done wrong by the time Dad got home.

NeilL Loc: British-born Canadian

:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup:

bcheary Loc: Jacksonville, FL

Now isn't that the truth. Blame it on the liberal system where the power of discipline has been taken away from both parents and teachers. :(

NeilL Loc: British-born Canadian

Also, thou shalt treat these little buggers like adults.

bcheary Loc: Jacksonville, FL

:lol: :lol: :thumbup: :thumbup:

bemused_bystander Loc: Orkney Islands, UK

"It's at times like this that I wish I had listened to my mother"

"Why, what did she say?"

"I don't know, I didn't listen!"

RIP D.A.

bcheary Loc: Jacksonville, FL

:thumbup: :thumbup: :-D