heyrob Loc: Western Washington

It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties, now and then, just to loosen up. Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker. I began to think alone ---- "to relax," I told myself ---- but I knew it wasn't true.

Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time. That was when things began to sour at home. One evening I turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life - and that night she went and spent the night at her mother's. I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't help myself. I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau, Muir, Confucius and Kafka. I would return to the office all turned around, asking, "What is it exactly that we are doing here?"

One day the boss called me in. He said, "Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop thinking on the job you'll have to find another job." This gave me a lot to think about. I came home early after my conversation with the boss. "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking...""I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!" "But hon, surely it's not that serious."

"It is serious," she said, lower lip a quiver. "You think as much as a damn philosopher and philosophers don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking, we won't have any money!" "I think that's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently. She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama. "I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door. I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche. I roared into the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors.

They didn't open. The library was closed. To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night. Leaning on the glass door, a Thinkers Anonymous poster caught my eye. "Is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked.

This is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker. I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was "Porky's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting. I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life just seemed easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking.

The road to recovery is nearly complete for me. Today I took a final step.

I joined the Democrat Party.

chrisscholbe Loc: Kansas City, MO

YOU.....a democrat.....ROTFLMAO.

Everyone know you are NOT a democrat.

So the last line SHOULD have been......I joined the REPUBLICAN Party.

LOL..........LOL...........LOL

heyrob Loc: Western Washington

No I quit them in the 1990's now I'm joining up with the rest of the folks who never think. :thumbup:

chrisscholbe Loc: Kansas City, MO

So, you quit the democrats in the 1990's and now you're a republican........who never thinks?

Got it.

heyrob Loc: Western Washington

Typical liberal, you have to explain even the simplest things to them or they screw them up. Now I'll type slowly so you can keep up... I quit being a Republican in the 1990's, now as a recovering Thinker, I've decided to join the Democratic Party since no thinking for oneself is required. Just follow the party line and all will be right with the world. Just ask Barack.

chrisscholbe Loc: Kansas City, MO

Typical conservative.

They speak in vague and ambiguous language and can refute everything because they were misunderstood.

Bangee5 Loc: Louisiana

Give it up. You are showing that you can not think...

gusto7670 Loc: Tampa, FL

If you visit an old folks home, you will see a lot of "thinkers". Some say that they have given up and are awaiting their "time"
I have had a few bouts with thinking but not to extreme,(as far as I know)Sometimes when I am getting dressed in the morning, I start thinking about what I will be doing that day, or how I plan to do something. Before I know it several minutes have passed. I then think, wow, I sure have wasted a lot of time sitting here. So, I try not to do that anymore.

And yes, I vote republican but don't go out shaking the bushes.

chrisscholbe Loc: Kansas City, MO

Don't blame me if you didn't think this through before you started this thread.

heyrob Loc: Western Washington

And therefore he is a Democrat! :thumbup:

JAW Loc: LA

Hayrob, that's funny, a neighbor pretty much stated the same issues verbally (using less thinking and thought less of it) to me the other day and told me they decided to joined the Republican Party. Guess you both have something in common - "extreme, self absorbing thinking" - thinking you had the answer to your problem by joining the Democratic party. You see how your thinking got you into this trouble. Thinking, got you in trouble with your Boss, your wife and then you joined the wrong political party (maybe for spite). From your thread, I thought you were more of an Independent thinker - maybe too much thinking on your part!!
Wondering why you put so much into your post - why not just say you are a big stinker and be done with it. Thinking as you state - got you in trouble.
Oh my goodness, would you look at that. I put an s before the t in thinker and left out the h in thinker. Oh No!! How in the world can I correct this? Oh well, with typical mistakes like this in our threads, one might think I had planned to type stinker but then one might think I had planned to type thinker.
My reply is in jest, just having a little fun with your thread.

heyrob Loc: Western Washington

I think your village is missing it's idiot codger. ;-)

JAW Loc: LA

Thanks heyrob, I'll go look for him right now! Don't wait up!

heyrob Loc: Western Washington

Wow, I didn't realize that the low information voters on here were going to need a disclaimer with this.

The original post was offered as "HUMOR", (that's a story intended to cause laughter). I didn't write it, I'm not married, and I'd have to be in a coma to even dream of becoming a Democrat (or Republican for that matter). Read it, have a laugh, or don't, I don't give a rip. Lighten up, get a life and don't take everything you read so seriously. :lol:

JAW Loc: LA

OK, why the name calling - I wrote my thread in jest as you can see in my the last sentence. I took your thread as a point of laughter also. Let's not get up tight and start saying things we don't mean. Keep the laughter going - don't take these threads so personal. You should know by now, someone will always take a thread the wrong way and make it personal - I guess, it's human nature.