Advice to my friends in cold climate...
Jan 25, 2018 08:16:28 #
What a morning..
8:00 I made a snowman.
8:10 A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.
8:15 So, I made a snow woman.
8:17 The nanny of the neighbors complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest.
8:20 The gay couple living nearby grumbled that it could have been two snowmen instead.
8:25 The vegans at No. 12 complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.
8:28 I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.
8:31 The Muslim gent across the road wants the snow woman to wear a headscarf.
8:40 Someone calls the cops who show up to see what's going on.
8:42 I am told that the broomstick of the snowman needs to be removed because it could be used as a deadly weapon. Things get worse after I mutter : "Yeah, if it's up your a***"
8:52 My phone is seized and thoroughly checked while I am being blindfolded and flown to the police station in a helicopter.
9:00 I'm on the news as a suspected terrorist bent on stirring up trouble during this difficult weather.
9:10 I am asked if I have any accomplices.
9:29 A little known jihadist group has claimed it was their plot.
Moral: When it's this cold, stay inside.
End
8:00 I made a snowman.
8:10 A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.
8:15 So, I made a snow woman.
8:17 The nanny of the neighbors complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest.
8:20 The gay couple living nearby grumbled that it could have been two snowmen instead.
8:25 The vegans at No. 12 complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.
8:28 I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.
8:31 The Muslim gent across the road wants the snow woman to wear a headscarf.
8:40 Someone calls the cops who show up to see what's going on.
8:42 I am told that the broomstick of the snowman needs to be removed because it could be used as a deadly weapon. Things get worse after I mutter : "Yeah, if it's up your a***"
8:52 My phone is seized and thoroughly checked while I am being blindfolded and flown to the police station in a helicopter.
9:00 I'm on the news as a suspected terrorist bent on stirring up trouble during this difficult weather.
9:10 I am asked if I have any accomplices.
9:29 A little known jihadist group has claimed it was their plot.
Moral: When it's this cold, stay inside.
End
Jan 25, 2018 08:19:10 #
Jan 25, 2018 08:22:51 #
Jan 25, 2018 08:24:50 #
Wow, thanks for this Wacko advice, I realize you are striving to be humorous, that was quite creative indeed, but when I stay inside, it is because it is just to cold outside, and I do not enjoy the cold, frigid temps. I am 67 years old.
Jan 25, 2018 08:34:40 #
Largobob wrote:
What a morning.. br br 8:00 I made a snowman.... (show quote)
This would be real funny if it didn't so closely mirror reality
Jan 25, 2018 08:39:06 #
Jan 25, 2018 08:47:05 #
Jan 25, 2018 09:25:46 #
Sirsnapalot wrote:
This would be real funny if it didn't so closely mirror reality
Jan 25, 2018 10:26:26 #
SpeedyGraphic
Loc: Colchester, CT USA
8:32 This morning. I knew that I just had to "share' this! So I clicked the share button, innocently. Like a cross to a vampire, I was presented with an option to send it via
f a c e b o o k !!!!! I would rather cast myself into a sea of Black Widow Spiders or even worse; sit in on the "Inquiry" of the "russian collusion hearings" for 1 minute (OMG!)
Horror of all horrors! So, I am relieved to see the option for tweeting it, using my account (#SpeedyGraphic) knowing that I can truly impress my brothers and sisters with
my PC-ness (forgive me) when a admonition appears and it says; "Your message is understood but it was inspected, rejected and denied (injected)!!" WITWCT?*
What a way to start my day. And this being the second kick to my libertarian groin, as prior to this, I heard on the news that PETA is imploring (strong-arming) the
myriad of over-bearing, oppressive, ubiquitous, dialectical materialistic (ok. just pick one) so-called governments to tax meat! But, it's what's for dinner!!! Once again...
WITWCT?* (There it is again! (again!) I fully expect this (watch-a-ma-call-it? ;-) ) to go viral and become bigger than OMG, LMAO, and MBBFE!) Alright! I'll STFU. I hope
you can have a sparkling day. Oh. One more thing: *What Is The World Coming To?
f a c e b o o k !!!!! I would rather cast myself into a sea of Black Widow Spiders or even worse; sit in on the "Inquiry" of the "russian collusion hearings" for 1 minute (OMG!)
Horror of all horrors! So, I am relieved to see the option for tweeting it, using my account (#SpeedyGraphic) knowing that I can truly impress my brothers and sisters with
my PC-ness (forgive me) when a admonition appears and it says; "Your message is understood but it was inspected, rejected and denied (injected)!!" WITWCT?*
What a way to start my day. And this being the second kick to my libertarian groin, as prior to this, I heard on the news that PETA is imploring (strong-arming) the
myriad of over-bearing, oppressive, ubiquitous, dialectical materialistic (ok. just pick one) so-called governments to tax meat! But, it's what's for dinner!!! Once again...
WITWCT?* (There it is again! (again!) I fully expect this (watch-a-ma-call-it? ;-) ) to go viral and become bigger than OMG, LMAO, and MBBFE!) Alright! I'll STFU. I hope
you can have a sparkling day. Oh. One more thing: *What Is The World Coming To?
Jan 25, 2018 10:34:48 #
Jan 25, 2018 14:59:59 #
If you want to reply, then register here. Registration is free and your account is created instantly, so you can post right away.