Ugly Hedgehog - Photography Forum
Home Active Topics Newest Pictures Search Login Register
General Chit-Chat (non-photography talk)
The Scottish castaway.
Page 1 of 2 next>
May 10, 2017 11:12:24   #
bcheary Loc: Jacksonville, FL
 
One day a Scotsman, who has been stranded on a desert island for over ten long years, sees an unusual speck on the horizon.


"It's certainly not a ship," he thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft.

Suddenly, emerging from the surf is a drop-dead gorgeous blonde woman wearing a wet suit and scuba gear.

She approaches the stunned man and says to him, "Tell me how long itโ€™s been since you've had a cigarette?"

"Ten years," replies the Scotsman.


With that, she reaches over and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of fresh cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag and says, โ€œOch - in the name of the wee man is that good!"

"And how long has it been since you've had a sip of good scotch?" she asks him.

Trembling, the castaway replies, "Ten years." She reaches over, unzips her right sleeve, pulls out a flask and hands it to him. He opens the flask, takes a long swig and says, "Tis absolutely fantastic!"

At this point she starts slowly unzipping the long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit, looks at the man and asks, "And how long has it been since you've played around?"

With tears in his eyes, the man falls to his knees and sobs, "Oh, sweet Jesus! Don't tell me you've got golf clubs in there too!"

Reply
May 10, 2017 11:26:50   #
jeep_daddy Loc: Prescott AZ
 


Funny, had me going.

Reply
May 10, 2017 13:01:18   #
bcheary Loc: Jacksonville, FL
 
jeep_daddy wrote:


Funny, had me going.



Reply
 
 
May 10, 2017 17:35:11   #
Doddy Loc: Barnard Castle-England
 
Lol..

Reply
May 10, 2017 17:35:58   #
bcheary Loc: Jacksonville, FL
 
Doddy wrote:
Lol..



Reply
May 11, 2017 06:12:51   #
J-SPEIGHT Loc: Akron, Ohio
 
LMAO. seeing that I'm Scottish really hits home.
bcheary wrote:
One day a Scotsman, who has been stranded on a desert island for over ten long years, sees an unusual speck on the horizon.


"It's certainly not a ship," he thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft.

Suddenly, emerging from the surf is a drop-dead gorgeous blonde woman wearing a wet suit and scuba gear.

She approaches the stunned man and says to him, "Tell me how long itโ€™s been since you've had a cigarette?"

"Ten years," replies the Scotsman.


With that, she reaches over and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of fresh cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag and says, โ€œOch - in the name of the wee man is that good!"

"And how long has it been since you've had a sip of good scotch?" she asks him.

Trembling, the castaway replies, "Ten years." She reaches over, unzips her right sleeve, pulls out a flask and hands it to him. He opens the flask, takes a long swig and says, "Tis absolutely fantastic!"

At this point she starts slowly unzipping the long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit, looks at the man and asks, "And how long has it been since you've played around?"

With tears in his eyes, the man falls to his knees and sobs, "Oh, sweet Jesus! Don't tell me you've got golf clubs in there too!"
One day a Scotsman, who has been stranded on a des... (show quote)

Reply
May 11, 2017 07:14:12   #
swimbob Loc: Columbia, S.C.
 
No that is funny!

Reply
 
 
May 11, 2017 09:05:16   #
jaymatt Loc: Alexandria, Indiana
 

Reply
May 11, 2017 10:08:45   #
ebbote Loc: Hockley, Texas
 
OUCH!

Reply
May 11, 2017 20:02:24   #
rocket111
 
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜

Reply
May 11, 2017 20:09:09   #
bcheary Loc: Jacksonville, FL
 
J-SPEIGHT wrote:
LMAO. seeing that I'm Scottish really hits home.



Reply
 
 
May 11, 2017 20:09:28   #
bcheary Loc: Jacksonville, FL
 
swimbob wrote:
No that is funny!



Reply
May 11, 2017 20:09:41   #
bcheary Loc: Jacksonville, FL
 
ebbote wrote:
OUCH!



Reply
May 12, 2017 04:49:51   #
canondave1 Loc: Houston, TX
 
bcheary wrote:
One day a Scotsman, who has been stranded on a desert island for over ten long years, sees an unusual speck on the horizon.


"It's certainly not a ship," he thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft.

Suddenly, emerging from the surf is a drop-dead gorgeous blonde woman wearing a wet suit and scuba gear.

She approaches the stunned man and says to him, "Tell me how long itโ€™s been since you've had a cigarette?"

"Ten years," replies the Scotsman.


With that, she reaches over and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of fresh cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag and says, โ€œOch - in the name of the wee man is that good!"

"And how long has it been since you've had a sip of good scotch?" she asks him.

Trembling, the castaway replies, "Ten years." She reaches over, unzips her right sleeve, pulls out a flask and hands it to him. He opens the flask, takes a long swig and says, "Tis absolutely fantastic!"

At this point she starts slowly unzipping the long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit, looks at the man and asks, "And how long has it been since you've played around?"

With tears in his eyes, the man falls to his knees and sobs, "Oh, sweet Jesus! Don't tell me you've got golf clubs in there too!"
One day a Scotsman, who has been stranded on a des... (show quote)


You led me on-crazy funny!

Reply
May 12, 2017 09:10:16   #
phlash46 Loc: Westchester County, New York
 

Reply
Page 1 of 2 next>
If you want to reply, then register here. Registration is free and your account is created instantly, so you can post right away.
General Chit-Chat (non-photography talk)
UglyHedgehog.com - Forum
Copyright 2011-2024 Ugly Hedgehog, Inc.