Ctrclckws;
So this is a close as I can come to your example at this time.
Conditions:
D7100 50mm on tripod ISO-200 about 45 inches from lens to yellow car, no flash. I Adjust the shutter speed and using the exposure meter I kept it centered to try and maintain the same exposure. So I can diffidently see how the two need work together.

Time to start reading. :)

Picture 1 f/16 2.5 sec

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Picture 2 f/8 0.62 sec

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Picture 3 f/4 1/6 sec

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Picture 4 f/1.8 1/30 sec

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blackest,
Thank you for the link, I have it book marked. I will do as others have suggested and concentrate on the basic first then the flash.

Ctrclckws,
I will attempt to recreate a similar shot and upload to the forum. Thank you great example.

SusanFromVermont,
I will try that with the ball later tonight and see what comes of it. I have also purchased the book that many have recommended as well and will start my studying.

WayneT,
I am now the proud owner of "Understanding Exposure, Fourth Edition: How to Shoot Great Photographs with Any Camera" I will start my reading.

Blackest, yes I can see shadows/lighting, and I do not find your question rude at all. I have not thought about that before, that could be my missing piece. Again thank you for the reply.

SusanFromVermont , first thank you for the response. Yes I do try to determine distances in various ways, I do want to mention that I don't consider it a handicap, I only mentioned it because I never see the pictures with depth to them. A tree that might be 10 feet behind a subject is all flat to me. It is this way in real life as well If I was looking at a subject that is 10 feet in front of a tree, the tree looks like it is touching the person. So I mentioned it to see if there were ways that would help to judge things like that. So I constantly try to guess what looks like a good composed shot (not with much luck) I will also be reading more on the exposure triangle. I agree with everyone so far and plan on purchasing the book by Brian Petterson that has been suggested. I also assume once I understand what happens with the different setting that the pictures will look better to my wife/friends. A good example and I have done this is I had my wife take a picture in Auto some ducks in a pond just floating around near a fallen tree. I then took the same picture with same camera. Showed both to my daughter and she can point out the one I take every time. Each time is it similar results mine seem flat hers does not (of course to me they are both flat) I do now think I know some of that resolve is my DOF. So I will study, read, practice, take all the advice I can get and keep on shooting.

Also you mentioned that you use one eye, but your brain knows how to fill in the blanks, it expects images from both eyes and will tend to try to fill in the missing points when it can. My brain does not know how to fill in the blanks. :)

Thanks again for the reply.

WayneT,
Thank you that link worked.

WayneT, thank you for the link, but it is not opening to the book, rather to books in general. Can you provide the name of the book along with the author please?

Bob,
Thank you for the links.

WDrosss, thank you as well for your explanation.

MichaelH, thank you for the explanation. Maybe I will line of a set of subject as you described and see the results.

Bob, thank you for the reply and explanation. yes it does help some. So from the shooters POV how do I determine how to set the DOF from subject to background?

First thank you for this site. I am trying to get out of "Auto/Scene" so please be patient when I ask the same old questions AGAIN since I am sure that they have been answered before many times. Also it is worth noting that I am blind in one eye and have no depth perception so I am not real sure how depth is supposed to look. So far has have not been able to equate something to help me determine depth. Now I have been this way all of my life and use small tells in everyday life to help determine distance like counting ceiling tiles or floor tiles, the size of an object, things of that nature. So short of getting a tape measure out and staging a shot I don't know how I need to compose things to make them not look flat to everyone else(they always look flat to me).
Here is my setup:

Nikon D7100
Nikon fixed 50mm 1.8 (currently used in these pictures)
Nikon 18-300mm 1:3.5-5.6
SB900 Flash (current not used in these pictures)
Mounted on Tripod and using remote trigger
So here is my understanding of what happens when you change different setting. Please correct me if I am wrong on any of these
1. ISO - sensor speed (how fast the sensor can capture the image)
2. Shutter - How much light enters lens(how long the shutter stays open)
3. Aperture - focus area meaning that at 1.8 I am wide open meaning by subject and background are in focus (how big the opening is to focus on)

So I took a series of pictures at 30" from subject to camera using on board flash all set at 1/20s ISO-100
So I have a couple of questions on what is happening and why?
1. Why are the pictures getting lighter as I decrease the f-stop as well as loosing detail?
2. On picture 4 why is it now blury as well as washed out?

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Picture 1 f/16

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Picture 2 f/9

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Picture 3 f/5.6

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Picture 4 f/1.8

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